Witch Hunt
by alienangel19852003
Summary: X with Smallville. On the hunt for unusual activity Phoebe and Chris end up in the Meteor capital of the world. WIP, edited and revised, a new chapter should be up soon.
1. Let's go

Chapter 1

Pheobe Halliwell was despratley trying to locate Chris, her nephew while trying to finish her column vanquish a demon all on her own. She didn't want to involve her sisters they had enough going on most of which was way more important than what she had to do. She didn't feel like bothering Leo either. So her only option was her nephew from the future. She figured he was some where trying to find out who turns her other nephew his brother Wyatt evil. She closed her office door and tried callign again.

"Chris," She called this time more impatient.

Blue and white orbs decended in her office. She was glad she'd shut the blinds other wise her magic would have been exposed to every reporter at the Bay Mirror.

"What! " He said before he even materialized.

He was wearing one of those out fits that Pheobe didn't even try to understand and he was covered from head to toe in demon gore.

"I need your help." She said removing her glasses.

"I'm busy" He repiled coolly.

"I noticed. But I have an idea and it could help you figure out who is after Wyatt. That way you won't have to spend all your time killing random demons in the underworld," Pheobe said.

"Okay. I'm listening, " he said

"Well I scryed for unusual activity and this one place kept coming up red hot," she told him.

"Where?" He asked interested.

"Smallville Kansas ." Phoebe said.

Chris looked at her puzzled. "Never heard of it."

"I hadn't either not until I got this big map the crystal kept landing on Kansas for some reason. Then I got a map of Kansas to see where the crystal was indicating and it was Smallville right off the bat." She told him.

"You wanna go check it out get a couple of vanquishes in during your lunch break." He asked.

"This isn't a game this could be a lead. See in 1989 there was a metor shower there. I did some research and I learned that some people were affected by the metors they... they developed powers. What if some demons were affected?" She told him.

"We'd better go get your sisters." He said.

"No. Lets go check it out ourselves and if it's serious we can get them but other wise I don't want to involve them or Leo everyones got enough on their plate as it is with out me adding seconds." She told him.

"Well lets go" He said.

" Aren't you forgetting something?" Phoebe asked.

"What ?" He asked.

"Your clothes are covered in demon goo. Don't you think you need to change them?" She asked.

Chris looked down at his clothes.

"Oh. I'm going to go back to the manor and change I'll be back in a few." Chris said.

"Don't tell any one just yet it could be nothing it could just be nothing." Phoebe said.

"Okay I won't" He said orbing away.

* * *

When Chris got to the manor he didn't see anyone around and he was thankful because that way he wouldn't have to lie. He headed straight up stairs to Piper's bathroom. It was so cluttered with such blatantly female things. Mostly wet clothes that couldn't go in the dryer. He avoided them like the plague. He took off his dirty clothes and got in the shower. He didn't want to keep Phoebe waiting long. He was actually glad to get out of the city and away from the underworld for a while and maybe this Smallville place had a lead in the Wyatt case. They had to try. And they would probably go under cover and that would be pretty cool.

He was also glad to walk away from the stress in the Leo department. Every since he well baby him had been conceived he been trying to keep away from his parents especially Leo. And everything was weird with Piper too. He just couldn't get attached to either of them because when he returned to his own time he would only have Phoebe. He like hanging out with her she was cool and he could actually talk to her.

He finished his shower and got dressed and then he went up to the attic to get some potions. When he got to the top of the stairs he found Leo pouring over the book.

"Chris, hey what are you doing ? I thought you'd be in the underworld now tracking down some leads." Leo said.

"I am this is just a stop over I need to grab some potions and I'm on my merry way" He said with false enthusiasm.

"Okay. Do you need some help?" Leo asked

"No. I got it covered." Chris said.

"If you need me I'll be at magic school with Piper. I just need to cross reference something in the book." Leo told him.

"Okay. " Chris said wishing Leo would leave.

"Okay. " Leo said and he orbed away.

Chris grabbed the potions off the table and then he orbed back over to Phoebe's office at the Bay Mirror. She was sitting in her desk staring at the computer screen.

"I just got the weirdest email." She told him.

"You always get weird emails you are an advice columnist." He told her.

"Yeah but this one is even weirder. Guess where its from?" She asked.

"Brittany Spears needs advice about her next wedding?" He asked.

Phoebe laughed, "Funny. Its from Sleepless in Smallville. This guy wants advice on whether to tell his girl friend his big secret."

Chris considered this for a moment. "What kind of secret?" He asked.

"He doesn't say but he makes it sound a bit dangerous." Phoebe said.

"You think he's one of those meteor freaks?" He asked.

"Way to turn a phrase there Chris. I don't know maybe. He could be a witch too. A demon or anything. Though I don't think he wants to hurt anyone. He just seems... lonely. He wants to reach out to this girl but he doesn't know what to say. "Phoebe explained.

Chris knew how that felt.

"Lets go." He said.

"I don't think going to Smallville is about helping Wyatt anymore. Do you still want to go?" She asked.

"Yeah. I still want to go. The scrying crystal landed on Smallville that means we should go. I trust your instincts and if they say go to Smallville we'll go ok. It's not a big deal. I need a break anyway and everyone is working on Wyatt's case at the magic school." He told her.

She stood up and walked over to him. "We need to make a quick pit stop. How much potion did you bring?"she said.

"Why?" He asked.

"There's a demon that needs vanqiushing, I've got his location."

He took her hand and he orbed them out.

After a stopover at an empty alley in San Franciscoand vanquishing the demonhe orbed them to an alley in Smallville. There were people on the street beyond but the alley was totally deserted. Phoebe walked ahead toward the street .

"I can see why they named this place Smallville its tiny." Chris observed as they walked past shops and such.

The heels on Phoebes shoes was drowned out completely when a loud red pick up roared into one of the tiny parking spaces next to the side walk. Both Chris and Phoebe stopped walking as the owner stepped out of the truck.

He was a tall guy built a bit better than Chris who assumed that was on account the fact that the guy was probably a farm boy and he probably did some heavy lifting and Chris orbed every where because it was easy and he was lazy. Chris also noticed the noise his aunt made as the guy ran by. He knew she probably thought he was hot. But another look told him that Phoebe's empathy was working over time.

"That's him." She said turning suddenly and following the guy into the coffee shop.

Chris had no choice but to follow her.

"Pheobe."Chris said as he followed her follow that guy over to the counter where an attractive brunette girl was standing.

"Lana, can I talk to you for a second?" The guy asked her.

"Yeah sure " said the brunette girl Chris deduced that her name was Lana.

Then Lana turned to Phoebe. "Can I help you." she asked.

"Uh... me. No I'm still deciding. I don't know if I'm in the mood for a cappuccino or just regular coffee." Phoebe said.

"What about you?" Lana asked him.

"I'm still deciding too." He told her.

Lana flashed him a smile and turned back to the other guy who was now staring at them or rather at Phoebe.

"It's you! You're Phoebe Halliwell!" The guy said grinning.

"My friend Chloe and I read The_ Bay Mirror_ all the time. I even sent in a letter once." He said blushing.

"Really? I didn't know I had that big of a fan base here in Smallville." Phoebe said grinning.

Chris rolled his eyes she always did that when her fans gushed.

"What brings you to Smallville?" He asked.

"Uhh..." Phoebe started.

"Sorry I'm so excited I nearly forgot my manners. People are going to start thinking I was raised on a farm. My name is Clark Kent. " he said extending his hand.

Phoebe reached out and shook his hand and then she flinched the way she always did when getting a premonition.


	2. Phoebe takes a walk on the weird side

Chapter 2

When Phoebe touched Clark a rush of images hit her all at once. She saw Clark tied to a stake in in the middle of feild alone and miserable. She could feel everything he felt. She saw other images too, she saw him help people she had felt their pain at first but as soon as he showed up it was gone. She saw his power and she felt it when she touched him. Although she wasnt entirely clear on what he was and what kind of powers he had she knew he was good.Finally the vision was over and Phoebe snapped back to reality.

"You. " She whispered to Clark Kent who was still holding onto her because otherwise she was sure she would have hit the floor.

"What? Ms. Halliwell are you alright."

Clark asked looking absolutely terrified.

"She's fine. She gets a little dizzy sometimes." Chris interjected as Clark let go of Phoebe once her balance was restored.

Clark looked at Chris puzzled.

"I'm Chris by the way. Phoebe's assitant. Her incompent assistant." Chris said extending his hand for Clark to shake.

Clark shook Chris' hand but the puzzled expression on his face remained. Phoebe smiled.

"Are you sure you're alirght Ms. Halliwell? " Clark asked.

"I'm sure. And I insist you call me Phoebe." She told him.

Clark's puzzled expression evaporated and he smiled.

"Okay. Phoebe what brings you to town.?" Clark asked.

"She must be going to that event Lex Luthor is having in Metropolis tomorrow. " said the pretty brunette behind the the counter.

Phoebe didn't catch her name but she could tell she was totally crushing on Clark. Phoebe had heard about the event Lex was hosting he had specifically invited _Ask Phoebe _through her editor Elise but Phoebe had declined the invitation. She needed the excuse now.

"Yes as a matter of fact I am." Phoebe said smiling thankful for the cover.

She need to get Clark to trust her she didn't need flimsy excuses now. She made a mental note to call Elise and see if she could get her back on the guest list for that event.

"Where are you staying?" The girl asked.

"Uh..." That was all Phoebe could muster she was having a total brain fart.

"We just got into town. I sort of forgot to make hotel reservations for us. This trip was kind of spur of the moment." Chris said.

He was playing the role of the role of incompotent assistant to prefection.

"That doesn't really explain why you're in Smallville it's like an hour and half from Metropolis." The brunnette behind the counter said.

Phoebe had no explaination for that.

" We rented a car and drove down. We wanted to see the meteor capital of the world." Chris said giving her that 100 watt Halliwell smile.

Phoebe knew she owed him one or maybe two.

"Oh." She said.

"I didn't quite catch your name." He said.

"I'm Lana. Lana Lang." She said.

" It's nice to meet you Miss Lang." He said turning on the Haliwell charm and hopefully putting her questions to rest for at least a while.

Chris was a good liar way better than her. She was very glad he'd come along.

"So is this like the number one hang out in Smallville?" Phoebe asked.

"It's the only hang out."Clark said.

"There's crater lake and the gorge."Lana said.

"Those are mostly places to you know... make out."Clark said.

"There have been a couple of those here at the Talon." Lana said pointedly though Phoebe didn't get the point but she figured it was more for Clark than anyone else.

Clark blushed and averted his eyes.

"Sorry." He said.

"It was a long time ago Clark." Lana replied.

Phoebe listened her empathy started to work over time she was feeling Lana's feelings.

"I'm leaving Clark. I can't do this anymore." Phoebe said before she could stop herself.

All three of them looked at her confused.

Unfourtunatley she continued, "I can't allow myself to continue being hurt. I can't put myself in that postion again." Phoebe said.

"What ?" Clark asked but before Phoebe could answer a wind seemed to sweep through the Talon.

She began to feel all sorts of emotions. Rage. Agitatation. And finally lust. She turned around to see Lex Luthor stomping toward them with a strange expression on his face. It was impossible to read but fortunatley Phoebe was a empath.

"Phoebe Haliwell. You're the last person I expected to find here in this quaint little coffee shop. Club scene get a little too intense for you." Lex said smiling a little.

The smile however didn't come close to reaching his eyes.

Phoebe had met Lex before when she was living in New York six years ago. Phoebe was only twenty one at the time and she was attending NYU and Lex was going to some ritzy boarding school and they met at the roughest club in the Bronx ironically enough. He kept trying to hit on her but Phoebe was dating a bouncer at the time and he was only sixteen she wasn't some child molester. She smiled.

"Lex long time no see."She said.

"Too long." He said looking her up and down.

She knew he was checking her out and the feeling was mutual. Being on the outs with Jason for so long made Phoebe feel weird around guys.

"I see you've met a few of the locals." Lex said.

"Yes and I've already creeped them out." Phoebe said.

"I'm sure they are used to it we deal with weird on a daily basis here in Smallville." Lex said.

" I doubt it was as weird as what just happened." Phoebe said.

"We've seen weirder."Clark said.

"**_We've _**been weirder." Lana said.

"Oh."Phoebe said.

"I take it that you arrival in town means that you are coming to the event?" Lex asked.

"Of course." Phoebe said.

"Where are you staying?" Lex asked.

"I don't know my assitant failed to book reservations. He's very incompotent." Phoebe said.

"Assistants usually are." Lex said.

"Standing right here!" Chris said.

"That's Chris my assistant." Phoebe said.

"No offense Chris." She said.

"You do know you should say that before you bad mouth somebody." Chris said jokingly.

"I'll try to remember that next time."Lex said.

"You know you welcome to say with me. Both you and your assitant." Lex offered.

"Thanks I think I will take you up on that." Phoebe said.

"Phoebe!" Chris said in a whispered shout if such a thing was possible.

"Excuse me. I need to have a word with my assistant." Phoebe said pasting a ridiculous fake smile on her face she grabbed Chris and lead him away from the other three.

"What do you think you are doing?"Chris asked her.

"Getting us a free place to stay in a masion." Phoebe answered.

"With a criminal mastermind? I lied when I told you I didn't know anything about Smallville. I know all about this place even what's going to happen to them." Chris said indicating Lex, Lana and Clark.

"It's not pretty."Chris said. "What happens?" Phoebe asked.

"I'm not allowed to tell you. Take my word for it. "Chris said.

"Just being here changes things Chris."Phoebe said.

"Exactly. I really don't want to get involved with Lex Luthor. You shouldn't either."Chris said.

"Maybe we can help him too."Phoebe said.

"I can see that you are going to do what ever you want any way. I'm just saying be careful." Chris told her.

"I think you are trying to maniplutate the situation yourself. Trying to change things on your own."Phoebe said.

"What if i am" Chris said.

" I just realized who the people are and the role they'll play in the future when Wyatt comes to power. I've got to figure this out myself first." Chris told her.

"Figure it out and in the mean time we are staying with Lex. End of discussion." Phoebe said.

Phoebe glanced back over Chris' shoulder at Clark, Lana, and Lex and she saw that two other teenagers had joined them a blonde girl and an African American boy. She knew they were talking about her and Chris. Phoebe knew she had to do some quick thinking because there would be more questions.

"Come on Phoebeit's show time." Chris said.

* * *

Clark watched Phoebe and her assistant as they talked it seemed serious. There was something strange about both of them but they seemed pretty cool. He couldn't entirely get over the fact that The Phoebe Halliwell was in his hometown. He didn't understandthe stuff she'd said earlier either. It was like she was possessed. He tried to hear their conversations but Pete and Chloe came in and distracted him. 

They were making a ridiculous amount of noise like always. It was like a freaking circus every time he went some where with them. Granted it was a lot of fun. Chloe was on Pete's back and he was huffing an puffing like he was going to die. Clark could easily carry her but of course he had super strength. Chloe wasn't very heavy though she was bigger than Lana and probably bigger than Phoebe too. Pete was just making a big deal out of it as usual.

Since Pete had kissed Chloe in the elevator that daya nd told her how he felt they'd been sort of testing the dating waters. Clark was glad for them. He wanted to get back together with Lana too. But it would take a lot more than a good kiss to get them together again it would take a miriacle to get them together and Clark didn't even have a prayer.

"Chloe I think you'd better lay off the twinkes." Pete said as Chloe got off his back.

"Funny." She told him.

"I know." Pete said grinning as he leaned in to kiss Chloe both Clark and Lana flinched as if they'd been scalded.

"Ew. Get a room." Lana said.

She was so jealous that Chloe had someone and she didn't.

After the fiasco named Adam Knight and the on going cycle of failed romance with Clark Lana really missed having a boyfriend.

She still had feelings for Clark but she refused to act on them not until he was honest with her. She seriously doubted he would so Lana had a back up plan. She had applied to the Paris School for the Arts and she was waiting on her acceptance letter. She was going to get out of Smallville. It was strange how Phoebe had said all the things she was feeling inside that she just couldn't say all these months after having only been in Smallville five minutes.

Phoebe's assistant was hot maybe she would hook up with him in the meantime. She wondered if she could make Clark jealous he had certainly been jealous of Adam. Lana decided to flirt with him when they rejoined them. Lana finally raised her eyes from the counter and saw that Pete and Chloe's gross sloppy pda was over and that Lex and Clark were talking about Phoebe.

"She's a very interesting woman wouldn't you say Clark?" Lex asked.

"Interesting doesn't begin to cover her."Clark said.

"She weirded you out that much? I thought you guys were the experts on weird." Lex said in a mocking tone.

"You should have heard what Phoebe said Lex it was like she read what was inside of me."Lana said before she could stop herself.

"You're leaving.?"Clark asked. Lana opened her mouth to say something but Chloe interrupted.

"Did you say Phoebe? As in Phoebe Halliwell of the San Francisco _Bay Mirror _Phoebe?" Chloe asked.

"Yeah. She's standing right over there they've been talking about her for the past five minutes where in the hell have you been." Pete said.

"What! Rewind and Freeze she's been here the whole time talking to these three clowns and a real live journalist is in our mists?" Chloe asked.

"I'm afraid so Chlo." Lana said as Chloe started over to where Phoebe was sliently talking to her assistant.

"Did she just call me an idiot?" Pete asked.

"If the shoe fits."Lana said.

"I'm her man." Pete said proudly, "Not just some random fool."

"I think she used the term clown. Apparently, Chloe thinks we're idiots too." Lex said.

"Are we in any way clowny?"Clark asked very concerned.

"You do have clown feet." Lana said gesturing to Clark's feet.

"Those things are giangantic." Lex agreed and they all laughed.

"I'm gonna go over there before Chloe mauls Phoebe."Pete said.

Phoebe was about to suggest to Chris that he call Elise and tell her they were going to attend that event when the loud blonde girl who had been talking to Clark and the others only moments eariler came up to her.

"OMG! You're Phoebe Halliwell aren't you. OMG!" She gushed.

"Yes. I am."Phoebe said.

"I'm Chloe Sullivan and I am like your biggest fan. I read your column relegiously."Chloe said shaking Phoebe's hand.

"I know." Phoebe said before she could stop herself.

Chloe looked at her funny.

"Your friend Clark told us." Chris interjected.

"That's Chris my incompent assistant."Phoebe said.

"Hi." Chris said smiling at her. Phoebe hoped he was getting a thing for the blonde he could do a little better.

"It's so nice to meet you Chloe. I rarely get to interact with my readers."Phoebe said as the African American boy who had come in with Chloe walked up.

"Chloe I see you left her alive. I saw that extreme grip you had on her had I'm suprised you didn't break her wrist. "He said. Chloe still hadn't let go of her hand.

Phoebe finally mangaged to pry her hand from Chloe.

"Pete shut up this is a real writer. Give me a second to bask in her presence."Chloe said.


	3. Krpto what?

Chapter 3

After the coversation with Chloe Chris felt like he would do anything for a cup of coffee. He would lick the coffee filter just to get some caffene into his system. Just talking to the blonde wore him out and he'd only said like five words to her if that. He felt sorry for Phoebe Chloe had latched on to her like a parana to a swimmer in shallow water. She talked insecently and no one else could get a word in edge wise.

Chris could barely keep up with to convo and Chloe's boyfriend was eying him supicously. Like he was interested in Chloe. Chris had begun to think that there were only two girls in that town to hook up with. He walked over to the counter Phoebe followed with Chloe still talking to her.

"I decided." He told Lana.

"Okay. What can I get ya." She said.

"Anything with caffiene." He said.

"At this point I'd lick a coffe filter." He told her.

He watched as she made a foamy mocachino.

"Throw in a couple of coffee grounds for later." He said grinning.

"How about sprinkles?" She asked.

"That will do " Chris said grudgingly.

Lana set his mochachino in front of him.

"How much do I owe you?" He asked.

"It's on the house. "Lana told him.

"I don't have any actual money but I know Phoebe's credit card number." He told her.

"You know my what?"Phoebe asked.

"How do you know my credit card number? "She asked.

"I'm not quite as dumb as I look. " Chris said.

"I'll try and remember that." Phoebe said.

"Please do. Where's your number one fan?" Chris asked taking a sip of his mochachino.

It was heaven he seriously wanted to marry the mochachino. He could live happily ever after with the mochachino.

"She saw something shiny outside and ran for it." Phoebe said.

"Hmm.." Chris said involuntarily whimpering at his previous sip.

He turned back to Lana who was looking at Lex and Clark who were in grossed in a coversation without her.

"How do you do it?" He asked.

Lana looked at him.

"Do what?" She asked. "Make the bestest mochachinos in the whole world." Chris said.

"It's really that good?" She asked wrinkling her nose in a cute way.

She reminded him of Bianca.

"Would I lie to you?" He asked waggling his eyebrows the way Phoebe often did.

"I don't know." Lana said blushing slightly.

"Let me see that." Phoebe said taking Chris' mochachino before he could protest she took a sip.

"OMG! I've got to have one." Phoebe said handing Chris his back.

She'd took a huge glup and half of it was gone.

He didn't protest he just took a long sip through the straw. There was commotion outside and Clark ran out. He was followed by Lex and then Lana and Phoebe. Chris hated having to drag his lazy but off that stool but the whiteligher in him had to see if he could help. So Chris walked out two minutes too late to have seen the show.

Lex and Phoebe were helping Clark get up. Pete was yelling and screaming for no reason Chris could see. Lana was holding Pete back almost as if there was some one to fight near by.

"What's going on?" Chris asked there was no concern in his voice because he really didn't care. Though he did notice that Clover or whatever her name was was gone.

"Chloe's been kidnapped again." Lana said with Pete flailing about in her arms but Lana didn't seem to notice or care. It was like she had superstrength or somehthing.

Lana didn't sound too concerned.

"Oh, okay. Did you say kidnapped again.?" He asked.

"Yep this is like the fourth or fifth time. All of us has been taken hostage once or twice. You live through it and you move on it happens again and you get used to it." Lana said.

Chris was used to it being taken over by demons having to save his mom and his aunts or his brother.

"I doubt you've been taken hostage by gangsters smoking Kryptonite." Pete said calmly and Lana released him.

"What?" Both Chris and Lana asked in unison.

Lex and Phoebe were dragging Clark over to them.

"We have to go after them." Lex said.

"My car is blocked in" Pete said.

"Mine too. What about your rent a car Phoebe?" Lex asked

"What?" Phoebe asked looking terrified.

Chris figured he'd better take this one. He looked around confused.

"Where is it? "Chris said more to himself than anyone else.

He went over to an empty space. "It's gone." He declared.

"What? You lost the rent a car already." Phoebe chimed in he figured she would.

"It started out so ingorant. We got into town I was like you know what I want me some Peanut M&M's. I just had to have them. I left the keys in the car. I guess some one took it." Chris said shrugging his shoulders.

"Oh well." He said singsongy.

That coffee had the wierdest affect on him. Clark seemed to recover from what ever had him on the ground and he was standing on his own.

"You lost our rent a car and all you can say is 'oh well'?" Phoebe said.

"Yeah. "Chris said pointedly. She winked at him none of the others saw it.

"We can take my truck." Clark said. Whatever was wrong with him before had worn off.

"Phoebe, You don't think I should call Piper?" Chris asked.

"Would it kill you to call her mom once and while."Phoebe said.

"Fine should I call my mommy." Chris said as he gave Phoebe a serious face.

"And have her look in the book under krypto...What was that you said man?" Chris asked,Chloe's boyfriend.

"I ain't say nothing." He said.

" Pete you did we heard you." Lana said.

"What's going on what are you hiding?" She asked looking at Pete with her intense green eyes.

Pete refused to meet her gaze.

"It's not my secret to tell." Pete said.

"What if your girlfriend gets hurt. We can help." Phoebe said stepping closer to Pete.

Chris knew she was using her empath power.

"You're right its not you secret to tell. It's Clark's. " Phoebe said looking at Clark.


	4. Riding in pickups with perverted billona...

**AN: I don't own the rights to the song Honey. I don't even want to. Chris has a little fun with the cd player in Clark's truck. I know 'Goodies' was not out at the time but I will still use it though i dont own that either. Well here goes the long awaited much debated Chapter 6.**

Chapter 4

Chris knew Clark had a secret because Phoebe had told him and she had just basically outed him. Fourtunely for Clark Pete quickly came to his rescue before Phoebe could read anything else.

"We need to find Chloe now. I know where they are." Pete said soberly.

Clark reached in his pocket and tossed his keys to Lex who caught them easily in one hand. "You drive. Me and Pete will ride in the back. The four of you can fit up front." Clark said.

"I doubt it Chris's butt is bigger than it looks and besides I haven't rode in the back of a pickup since my Grams was alive." Phoebe said.

"Okay. Well it settled then. Lex do you know the way to the projects? "Pete asked.

"The housing projects?" Lex asked.

"Yes. You do want to get Chloe back don't you. I suppose we could send the cops but they are to scared to go out there themselves." Pete said.

Lex walked over to the driver's side

"Lets go they should be too hard to find. I'll look for a black hooptie." Lex said.

"Hey." Pete said as he climbed in the back.

Chris wished he was riding in the back. Maybe he'd get control of the radio. He doubted the pick up had a cd player. He got in on the passenger side forgetting that would put him in the middle and the rather pertnant fact that Lex _liked _young men. To his suprise there was a personal cd player hooked up to the cassette player in the truck. Lana climbed in beside him and she gave him a blindingly white smile and he could help but smile back at her.

Once Clark and Phoebe were on the back Lex started the engine and Chris started playing with theCD player. There was a CD inside disc two of the the Mariah Carey remix album. Chris smiled to himself he knew that sameCD was probably in Phoebe car cd player at home. He knew all of the songs most of them by heart. He skipped to track six. Lana watched him over one shoulder and Lex over the other.

He decided that he would give them an interesting ride. The song started and he started to move to the music.

"Oh Honey you can have me when you want me you simply ask me to be there and you're the only one who makes me come running cause what you got Is far beyond compare." Chris sang along with Mariah Carey.

"And it's just like honey when your love comes over me oh baby I've got a dependancy always strung out for another taste of your honey it's like honey when it rushes over me you know sugar never ever was so sweet and I'm dying for you  
crying for you I adore you boy you know your love addicted me and I'm strung out on you, darling don't you see every night and day I can hardly wait for another taste of honey. "

When he got to the chorus Lana was singing with him.

Lex was watching him more intensely than he was watching the road. And he wasn't looking at Chris' face but down at his jeans calculating. Chris tried to ingore it but his gaze was like heat lamp.

"Honey I can't describe how good it feels inside honey I can't describe how good it feels inside yeah, ooh Oh, I can't be elusive with you honey cause it's blatant that I'm feeling you"

"And it's too hard for me to leave abruptly you're the only thing I wanna do." Chris continued to sing despite the fact that Lex was staring at him.

And Chris was tired of it. He switched off the cd player. One of his favorite songs popped into his head. He didn't know if it would be out in this time. He looked at Lex and he started to sing.

"You might look at me and think that I'm j ust a young boy but I'm not just a young boy baby this is what I'm lookin' for: sexy, independent, down to spend it type that's gettin' _her _dough."

"I'm not bein too dramatic that's the way I gotta have it. Bet you want the goodies.Bet you thought about it.Got you all hot and bothered. Mayb' cuz I talk about it. Lookin for the goodies."

"Keep on lookin' cuz they stay in the jar Oh-oh Oh-oh Oh-oh Oh-oh Just because you drive a Benz  
I'm not goin home with you. You won't get no nookie or the cookies. I'm no rookie."

"And still I'm sexy, independent I ain't wit' it so you already know. I'm not bein too dramatic that's the way I gotta have it You think you're slick Tryna hit But I'm not dumb I'm not bein too dramatic it's just how I gotta have it."

Lex smiled at him.

"You're good." Lex said.

Lana looked at them confused.

Chris didn't bother to fill her in.

"I'm damn good." He said.

He had a feeling they were talking about two different things.

"I know that but do you have repersentation?" Lex asked.

"What?" Chris asked.

"You really are incompotent. I'm talking mangement. An agent. A handsome guy like you with a voice like that. You could sell millions." Lex told him.

Chris was baffled. He thought that Lex was saying that he was good and not bad. And he'd said 'Damn good' sort of stament of a fact and now Lex was looking at him funny and commenting on his voice and it was beyond weird.

"I've never really thought about that." Chris said.

"You should. You have a talent that can take you places." Lex told him.

Chris sat there unable to speak staring out the window think of the place he'd been the world he knew. He saw that they were in the projects.

"Lex you know that idea about the hooptie might not work." Lana said.

"Why?" Both Chris and Lex asked.

They looked around there were black hoopties every where.

Lex parked the truck . He made a big show about putting it into park stroking the gears in way he should not have. Lana didn't seemed to notice but Chris did. And he didn't like his body's response. Lana opened her door and got out Chris slid out after her unknowingly giving Lex a chance to see if what Phoebe said about butt was true. The others climbed off the back. Clark helped Phoebe and she was smiling at him like Scarlet O'Hara in GWTW.

Chris prayed that Phoebe wouldn't fall for Clark and he also prayed that Lex wouldn't molest him. Their work here was complicated enough with out sex getting in the way of that. He wished that the sexual comments and the stares would stop. He was feeling rather strange and he needed to put some space between him and Lex. He did so by going over to Phoebe.

"We should spread out and try to find her. "Clark suggested.


	5. We found Chloe you found Chicken

**AN: This chapter was so fun to write. R&R. If you don't like the slashy turn the story is taking tell me.**

Chapter 5

"I'll go with Clark." Pete said.

"I'm with Lana." Chris nearly shouted.

"Then I'm with Lex." Phoebe said happy about the pairing.

Chris knew she had a thing for Lex but if she only knew. But knowing Phoebe she probably did.

"Phoebe are you sure you don't want me to call mom. "Chris asked.

"No leave her out of this. I'll if we need them." Phoebe told him.

"Let me guess you two, little brother older sister." Lana asked.

Phoebe laughed.

"Yes we are." Chris said.

Phoebe stopped laughing to contemplate it.

"Let me guess he just got out high school need a job you gave him one." Lana said.

"Something like that." Phoebe said quickly.

"We should get started." Pete said.

They split up and Lana went with Chris. They passed houses with people on the porches. They asked about Chloe but none of would offer any info though. Then Lana spotted some smoke coming out of the window.

"It's green. " She told him.

Before he could stop her she walked through the open door he had no other choice but to follow to protect her.

"Lana." He said following her through the open door.

A big black gangster man was standing in front of Lana pointing a gun at her head. His posse was all around and so were their hos. Chloe was tied up with duck tape in the corner of the shabbly furnished room.

"Okay. We don't want any problems. Would you lower you weapon please?" Chris asked calmly.

Another gun cocked and this one was pointing at him. He wondered how could he die when techincally he wasn't born. But he had to do something before they got them selves killed. Even if it meant temperarely exposing his magic. He waved his hand and using his telikenisis and flung the gangbanger who had the gun on him against the wall. Chloe sheriked a little behind her duck tape muzzle.

"I asked you nicely. I never beg." Chris said which was true he never begged.

He was about to do the same trick on the guy who had Lana at gun point until she kicked the gun out of his hand and beat him into a sumissive fetal position on the floor befor anyone could even react.

"Anyone else want a piece of this?" Lana asked and even bigger man stood up and came over to them.

"I do." He said .

"That fancy tae bo may work on little J but it don't work on me." He said smiling meancinly at Lana.

"Get Chloe." She told Chris.

"This shouldn't take long." She told him.

He got Chloe. He picked her which was hard saying that she probably weighed as much as he did. He turned around just in time to see Lana fake out the big guy and with a left hook only to knee him the the balls he crumpled to ground just like the one before.

"Lets go ."She told Chris.

She stuck out her tounge at them as they left. Once they were outside Chris set to work untying or rather untaping Chloe.

Once he was finished he asked, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She said rubbing the tape burns on her arms.

"I saw what you did in there. " Chloe said simply.

"What?" Chris asked innocently.

"You have telekineisis." Chloe said matter of factly.

"Whatever. You must be up out your mind."Chris said simply.

"I saw it too." Lana said.

"You did? I thought you were to busy going La Femme Nikita on that guy." Chris said.

"That show sucks by the way you could have said Alias. " Lana told him.

"Whatever." Chris said as they walked toward the pick up.

"So you aren't even going to tell us and we saw what you did."Chloe said

"No." He said with his head down he wouldn't mind telling Lana or Pete or Clark hell he'd even tell Lex anyone but Chloe his secret she had a big mouth and she was a reporter it was written all over her.

"How did you fall in with those guys any way?" Chris asked.

"I want to know that too." Lana told Chloe.

He liked that Lana didn't press the issue she just took his sid against Chloe.

"I was trying to get an interview. You know Reggie O'neal?" Chloe asked.

"Tall dark basketball player now deceased. Voted one of Smallville High's hottest sophmores in last years Who's Hot issue of the _Torch_." Lana said.

"Yep. I was investgating his death. He used to run with Little J and the southside boys selling drugs made from the meteor rocks." Chloe said.

"So everything comes back to those meteors don't they. "Chris said.

"Yep. Haven't you been paying attention. You should really come down to my office and see the wall of weird its back up" Chloe said as Clark and Pete came from another direction.

Pete rushed over to Chloe and he hugged her.

Then he pulled back.

"If you were a guy I'd punch you for going doing something stupid like that for the sake of a story." Pete said angrily.

He grabbed Chloe and kissed her. Chris, Lana, and Clark had to look away. Watching anyone kiss that hard was like staring into the sun bad for the eyes.

They waited for a few minutes then Lex and Phoebe emerged from a house. Lex had some fried chicken and Phoebe had a Diet Coke. Chris and the others looked at them.

"What?" Lex asked with his mouth full.

"Ms. Rita had some leftover and she was going to throw it out so..." Lex explained.

"You found Chloe." Phoebe said.

"Yeah and you found chicken." Chris said.

"We were looking for Chloe. Honestly, Chris you need to loosen up. "Phoebe said.

"You really do." Lex agreed.

"I'll never get that loose. "Chris told him.

Phoebe smiled.

"You never know." She said.

"Trust me I won't. Can we get out of here before we die in a drive by." Chris said impatiently.

"Fine." Lex said walking around to the driver's side.

Pete helped Chloe get into the back of the truck.

Clark helped Phoebe.

Chris intentionally got in the middle.

He didn't know if he was jealous that Chloe and Phoebe were getting all the attention or if it was this new subconious need to be near Lex that surfaced once Lex appeared eating chicken.

Lana opted to sit in the bed of the truck with everyone else but Chris still sat int he middle to far over from where he should be he damned himself for doing so but he couldn't move. He didn't want to think the thoughts he was thinking so he fiddled with the radio instead. A song he'd never heard was on.

He liked it. It was sung by one of those male song writers. By the second chours Chris knew the words. He sang and Lex looked at him. And he liked it. Though he was imediately disgusted with himself for doing so.


	6. Lie future boy lie

**AN: I never expected to take this direction with this fic. I hope you enjoy. Sorry about the MJ bashing.**

**Please R&R. This Phoebe and Chris centric chappy will shed some light on the world Chris comes from and maybe a little on the mystery of Clark Kent.**

Chapter 6

Phoebe sat in the back of Clark's pick up laughing and talking with all of them. They seemed like great kids. Despite the fact that they didn't make her feel ancient for having been born in the 1970's they were still kids. She had to remind herself that she had been out of high school for over ten years and she was glad about that but a part of her wanted to go back. She wanted this experince and not her juvenile deliquient experice. She wished she had friends like these in high school instead the tough crowd she had run with.

Pete was telling a very dirty joke both she and Clark blushed at the punch line but Chloe seemed unfazed. Lana wasn't even paying attention. Phoebe sensed that Lana was trying to sort out her feelings because she was being hit with all these waring emotions aside from that she was having a great time until her cell phone rang. She knew it was either Elise her editor or her sister Piper.

"Hello." She said.

"Phoebe, where in the hell are you?" Piper screamed in her ear.

"Kansas." Phoebe told her.

"What! I take it that you're with Chris. " Piper said.

"Yeah you know that charity benifit Lex Luthor is throwing in Metropolis that I sort have got invited to? "Phoebe asked.

"Yes I remember you saying you weren't going. You also said that you weren't going to sleep with that snotty nose rich boy." Piper said. "

The last part is true. Lex is not that snotty nose rich boy anymore. He's different.And by the way he's not after me."Phoebe said.

"Intriuging." Piper said sarcastically.

"It is." Phoebe said.

"It had better not be my son. I know about men like Lex they want it all." Piper said.

"What?"Phoebe asked.

"You heard me he'd better not even think about Chris. I know about him I've read the _Inquistor_ before.I've seen the things people say he's done." Piper said.

"Those are just rumors it's not like he's Michael Jackson. Chris is a big boy he can stop Lex if he starts anything and I don't think he will." Phoebe said.

"Speaking of Chris where is he?" Piper asked. "

He's busy now but I'll having him call later to check in." Phoebe said.

"So whats he doing? "Piper asked.

"Making out with his new boyfriend." Phoebe said.

Piper gasped.

"It was a joke. You should remember humor you're older than me." Phoebe said.

"That was not funny it was a low blow." Piper said.

"Well I've gotta go." Phoebe said and then she hung up.

When she did she saw that Lana was looking at her.

"Was that your mom?" She asked.

"No. She just thinks she's my mom."Phoebe said.

"Oh. "Lana said.

"I like your brother. He's pretty cool." Lana said.

"He's a really good guy even though he's had it rough. There's so much he keeps hidden even from me. "Phoebe said.

Her mood had grown serious when she started to think about Chris. She didn't know much about his life in the future just that he's always gotten the short end of the stick.

Phoebe caught Clark staring at her. He blushed and looked away. She could feel what he felt. He was drawn to her and she was to him. Phoebe nervously ran her hand through her short hair. She decided to change the subject before things got intense. She took another sip of her Diet Coke.

"Lana, how did you and Chris manage to find Chloe.

"We saw the same green smoke that had been coming out of the car coming out of one of the windows. The door was open I walked in and Little J , he's the leader of the roughest gang in Smallville, pulled a gun on me."

"Chris came in told him to put the down. He didn't and another guy pointed a gun at Chris. But Chris waved his hand and the guy hit the wall and then I beat up Little J and this other guy while Chris got Chloe." Lana explained quickly.

Phoebe nodded. She couldn't belive Chris had used his powers in front of her and that a tiny girl like Lana took down some big gangster let alone two big gangsters. But she got a sense that Lana was different too.

Chloe had said something earlier when they first met that nothing is ever what it seems in Smallville and she was right. She knew something was going on up front with Chris and Lex. But she was more concerned about Clark he seemed more lonely than she was. Since Jason had found out about her he had run screaming away from her literally.

She missed being intmate with a guy. She knew she shouldn't check out Clark or notice how gorgeous he was how big his shoulders were and how nicely he was built.

She also tryed (failed) to not let him catch her staring at him. But he did and he smiled back and she couldn't help thinking how sexy his mouth was. She wanted him. And suddenly a wave of desire swept over her and before she could surpress it she had launched her self on him and she was kissing him.

She easily pinned him up against the side of the truck and he was not protesting he was kissing back. Phoebe was aware of the noise that the other three were making the shouts of encouragement from Pete and the chorus of encoraging shrieks from Lana and Chloe.

When Phoebe managed to pry herself from Clark realizing what a mistake it was to kiss him. And that it would be and even bigger mistake if she had allowed her hand to snake into his jeans like it had wanted.

"You kissed me. "Clark said breathlessly.

"Yeah. I'm sorry about that." Phoebe said.

"It was a great kiss I'm sorry you stopped." Clark said. Phoebe knew he was sincere.

She really needed to get a handle on her empathy.

The world didn't need a horny empath making out with teenage boys.

It had Michael Jackson for that.

She glanced down at Clarks jeans and saw that he was excited and he made no attempt to hide. 'To be a teenager again' Phoebe thought.

She remembered she had had a premonition when she kissed Clark but she couldn't remember what it was. Kissing Clark had been so intense and so wrong.

She knew it was wrong and these lusty feelings she felt weren't her own. They were his and they were hella strong from years of obvious self abuse and sexual repression.

She had sensed those when she first arrived and now they were completly fixed on her instead of Lana. And Lana's romantic hopes for Clark were dispating by the minute while she pondered the mystery of Chris.

* * *

Finally the truck came to a stop in front of the Talon. Lex and Chris got out as did Pete, Chloe and Lana. Clark helped Phoebe down holding her by the waist and lifting her high into the air as if she weighed nothing. The way he looked at her like she was some treasure that he discovered a new toy.

Chris didn't like the way Clark was looking at his aunt. He didn't like the feelings he was starting have. He felt dirty. He was thankful he'd cloaked his feelings with that potion he didn't want anyone especially Phoebe to know how he felt.

At least the Lex Luthor in this time didn't phscially abuse him for not taking him up on a perverted offer like the Lex from his time. When Wyatt came to power he wasn't allowed to come any where near Metropolis Lex was mayor at the time and he had a team of powerful witches and sorcerers construct a barrier to keep Wyatt out.

Chris would often orb there to escape his brother. The first time he was offered asylum the second time Lex practically raped him. He orbed away before it go to serious. He still had the worst black eye ever but the next time he hid out in Metropolis he didn't let Lex find him. In the future he was always running from something and into something else and getting knocked on his ass. He was not going to let that happen now.

He looked over at Phoebe and Clark who were gazing at each other while everyone else was discussing Chloe's dramatic rescue. It wasn't that he didn't like Clark it was just that even though they had a fantastic connection Chris knew it wouldn't last eventually Phoebe would have to return home to her sisters and her life and Clark would have to go chase down his destiny and become some lame ass reporter who wore the same black suit like every freaking time you saw him and hang out with that Lois chick.

She was one tough broad. She had saved Chris once from Wyatt's spies in Metropolis. He figured he'd ask about her he'd like to know what she was like in this time.

Once there was a break in the conversation he asked, "Hey Clark where's Lois ?" Clark looked at him confused.

"Lois? Who is Lois? " Clark asked.

"_Oh._ You haven't met her yet have you? Lois Lane. Ummm...she's your partner at the _Daily_ -" Chris stopped because Phoebe clamped her hand over his mouth.

Everyone was staring at him the way they had at Phoebe earlier. He guessed he'd really messed up.

"You know Lois? "Chloe asked.

Phoebe removed her hand.

"Lie future boy lie. "Phoebe told him in a low whisper.

"Yeah." Chris said.

" OMG! That's my cousin." Chloe exclaimed.

Chris was shocked he didn't think the two of them were even remotley alike let alone have similar DNA.

"You must have been the guy she was raving about from that Karate camp she went to in Los Angeles." Chloe said.

Chris nodded dumbly.


	7. Of Mysteries and compromises

**AN: I think I'll get this story back on track. People are losing intrest with the new slashyness so maybe I should get the point.****There is another crossover in the works for this story and this one might explain some things about Lana pretty soon. Things about Clark though will take time for that reveal.**

Chapter 7

Lex had offered to give Chris and Phoebe a ride to his mansion since their rent car had been 'stolen'. The rent a car that Lex doubted even existed. They refused to tell the police what had happened to it Chris just muttered something under his breath that sounded like,"I'll take care of it." And then he stalked off behind Lana into the Talon leaving Lex, Phoebe, Clark, Chloe, and Pete standing there.

Phoebe followed Chris into the Talon a second later and Clark went after her and Lex was left with an unusally chatty Chloe and a slightly pissed off Pete. Lex nervously shoved his hands in the pockets of his trousers not really hearing a word of what Chloe was saying.

For a person who just got kidnapped she was awfully chipper. He couldn't help thinking about Chris the boy reminded him of Clark for some reason. He seemed so guarded. Phoebe was secertive but never guarded and he didn't think Chris was her brother either, though they looked alike they acted similar but it wasn't possible.

He had done his share of research on the Haliwell family right after he first met Phoebe in a smokey dance club in New York he had become obsessed with her. He had discovered that Phoebe's mother had died when she was two in an unexplained boating accident and Phoebe and her sisters were raised by their mother's mother.

Phoebe's father had divorced her mother not long after she'd been born. While Phoebe was in New York her grandmother became ill and she later died of heart complications.

Phoebe was the youngest of three until her sister Prue was killed in some inexplicable double homicide at their acestrial home Haliwell manor. Later, Phoebe and her other sister Piper discovered the illegitmate daughter from a relationship their mother had with anothe man and they had another sister Paige and the three of the moved in together.

Piper, Phoebe's older sister was married and soon she had a son. But nowhere in the records Lex came across was there any metion of a Christopher Haliwell.

Lex pondered these things while Chloe talked. He finally started paying attention.

"...I bet the want to rumble now after our gang totally kicked Little J's ass ." Chloe was saying. "God I hope not those dudes have guns and they sell drugs Chloe they are hard core. "Pete said.

"So are we. We can do things. "Chloe said.

"Neither of us has even been in a fist fight." Pete told her.

"I have that time Lana tried to kill me. And the time I pulled Latasha Carlson's weave out." Chloe said.

"I forgot about that." Pete said.

"You can't be serious about that whole rumble thing. Chloe, Pete is right. Those guys are hard core." Lex told Chloe.

"So are Chris and Lana they totally kicked Little J's ass." Chloe said.

Lex was getting tired of that phrase she had used it twice in the last minute and coutless times before when he wasn't really listening.

"What did they do? "Lex asked.

"First Chris used his telkinetic powers to fling a guy into a wall. Then Lana went all Uma Thurman on Little J and in like two seconds flat she had him defensless and curled up in the fetal postion." Chloe said.

"Did they now. "Lex said. He couldn't stop the grin from spreading on his face.

He knew Phoebe and her sisters were witches and it meant Chris was one too. He was probably some orphan that Phoebe took under her wing probably in more was than one Lex couldn't stop himself from giggling. The giggle suprised Chloe and Pete. They looked at him funny.

"I was thinking about... The Pirates of Pennenace. " Lex said.

Chloe and Pete started laughing too. Partly because they were sheepish and also because the movie was funny. Lex walked past them and went into the Talon.

Lana was fixing Chris another mochachino and flirting shamelessly with him while she was at it. Clark had one of Phoebe's hands and he was telling her something in a small whisper that Lex knew was causing the blush in her cheeks. Lex stood in the door way watching them. He was building a mystery putting together the secrets they kept like peices of a puzzle.

* * *

Clark loved the way Phoebe would say his name when he tried to kiss her again. It made him want to kiss her even more. And he didn't feel shy about it even though her little brother was a little further down the counter talking to Lana. The situation was weird although it wasn' t tense. He was aware of Lex watching from the door way.

And then he heard Lana's soft high pitched laughter and he remembered that he wasn't alone with Phoebe.Lex strode over to where Clark was with Phoebe.

"Clark you'd better dust off your tux looks like Phoebe's got herself a date for the event tommorrow.

"I..."Phoebe started.

But Lex was walking away.

"On to his next victims." Clark assumed.

"Looks like."Phoebe said.

"So how long are you going to be in town?" Clark asked.

"I... I'm not sure." Phoebe said.

"Okay. Well what are you doing tonight?" Clark asked.

"I really don't have any plans at the moment. " Phoebe said.

"Okay. How about you let me show you around. See some of the sights that kind of a thing. It's not a date so no pressure."Clark said.

"How old are you Clark?"Phoebe asked.

"16 and 3/4." He said blushing.

"Guess how old Iam."She said.

"I don't know. I guess you are about Lex's age. 23 or 24 something like that." Clark told her.

She made a sound affect similar to the one they make on game shows when a contestant got an answer wrong.

"25." He offered. She made the sound again.

"Alright 27. Phoebe I know you're older than me but I like you and I can't help it." He told her.

"I am 29 and a half. Clark, I'm almost 30. I'm too old to flirt with you make out with you or go on a non- date that will probably lead to statutory rape and I'm just not ready for jail yet." Phoebe said averting her eyes.

"Okay. I will promise to keep my hands to myself in more ways than one if you let me show you around. I'm not gonna stop begging until you do." Clark said.

"Fine. I'll go. " Phoebe said smiling in a way that made Clark's heart flip flop.


	8. Make yourselves at home

**AN: Thanx for the reviews it lets me know that I am forgiven for the tresspasses against these characters. You know I don't own them. I just like to play with them for a while. Sometimes I even put them back when I'm done. The next chapters are probably going have Buffy crossover. I'm gonna do a quick reveal of Lana and Clark's respective secrets. Oh by the way I don't own that movie I mentioned either. **

Chapter 8

Chris sat in the backseat of Lex's porche and sulked all the way to Lex's place while Lex and Phoebe talked. He felt totally ingored a feeling all to familar for him. He laughed at the irony of this ride. His whole life he'd taken a backseat to Wyatt especially with his parents.

Wyatt's problems were always more important than his. Everything Wyatt did seemed to be more important than what Chris did. The only person who actually saw past Wyatt and saw him was Phoebe. His mom was great but he could always tell that Wyatt was on her mind when she talked to him.

He had begin to wonder if anyone would ever think of him as Chris instead of Wyatt's brother. When he met Bianca he thought his dreams had come true. But she was more in love with the cause than with him. He had loved her he still loved her. He would never really get over her she was his first everything.

None of the girls at school would have anything to do with him. And by his senior year he stopped giving a damn and surrendered himself to geekdom.Most of his time in the future was spent with Bianca, running from Wyatt or hanging with Phoebe or his grandpa.

He felt kind of left out for a minute. But Phoebe's cell phone rang. She didn't answer it she handed it to him and winked. He knew what to do.

He answered it, "Phoebe Haliwell's phone." He said in his most efemmine male assistanty voice. It was Phoebe's editor Elise on the other end.

"You must be Phoebe's new assistant. " She said.

"Yes. I am. " He said still using that pretend voice that he'd stolen from that gay guy in _A Low Down Dirty Shame_

He had the sudden urge to call someone 'Miss Peaches.'

"Where is Phoebe? " Elise asked.

"She's kind of busy but I can take message." Chris said.

"No message. I just want to know where she is I've spent half of the morining looking for her." Elise said.

"Oh did I forget to tell you? Phoebe just decided to go to event she was invited to in Kansas. So we've spent most of the day on a plane. I lost the rent a car. And I think half of our bags are still at the airprort. It's been the worst day ever. Anyways, I will let Miss Peaches know you called. And she'll get back to ya. Okay bye bye." Chris said hanging up before Elise could protest.

"Well played." Phoebe said.

"Well it means a lot coming from you Miss Peaches. "Chris said still using that voice.

Lex and Phoebe laughed. " Is this Miss Peaches thing new?" Lex asked.

"Yeah. "Phoebe said still laughing.

"We watched that movie last week and it kind of got stuck in my head."

Chris said in his regular voice. Lex parked his car.

Chris didn't even notice they had arrived he didn't even see what kind of house Lex had.

Chris knew it had to be fancy.

Future Lex was the mayor of Metropolis and his house was the most beautiful most ornate home all of Metropolis. He and his trophy wife Melissa had produced two impeccable children despite Lex's obivious homosexuality.

He had been to their house twice. The first time Bianca was with him. Lex knew who they were and more importantly what they were. Lex and his family were gracious hosts to them that first time. The second time however, Chris got a rude awakening. He had been trying to orb away from Wyatt. Lex was the only person with the resources to keep Wyatt out so he went to him.

He found Lex drunk in his study. He told Lex he needed help. Lex nodded and stumbled away from his desk and attacked him. Not with fists but with his mouth and his hands. Chris had no idea what to do he struggled and he ended up with a black eye. He orbed home scared out of his mind but even more fancinated.

Lex wouldn't look much different in twenty years. Chris suspected Lex had some cast an anti aging spell on him.

Phoebe's voice brought him from his reverie.

"Chris are you going to get out anytime soon?" She asked.

Chris gave her look and slid out of the car.

They were in a vast garage full of beautiful cars.

"Holy shit." He whispered in awe of what surrounded him.

"Is there anything you don't have an excess amount of?" Chris asked finally returning denfensive roots.

Lex chuckled softly and then he looked at him.

"Yes." Lex said.

Chris could sympatheize with Lex and Chris held his gaze for a long moment.

"Oh dear God! Did it get all sexy between you two." Phoebe said making a face not one of her better ones and she turned and walked toward the door.

Chris followed her. One of Lex's security staff opened the door and the three of them walked inside. There were no words to desribe the place.

"Pretty swanky." Phoebe and Chris said in unison and then they looked at each other.

Lex laughed at them.

They were a lot a like. Sometimes Chris thought if Phoebe wasn't his aunt he could easily fall in love with her. He wondered if he would encounter some of the people from his future in this time. He wondered if that guy who wore all that blue spandex was around in this time saving people.

Wyatt had tried to fight Superman in the future and he got his ass kicked. So he left him alone that was the only person Wyatt had ever been afraid of. But not even someone dubbed as Superman was able to completely defeat Wyatt.

Chris followed Lex and Phoebe up stairs a few steps behind them gaging (in a good way) at the ornate detail of Lex's home.

"You'll be staying in some guest rooms in the same wing I usually reside in." Lex told them.

He opened the door to a room.

"Wow." Phoebe said following him inside.

"You like it. You can sleep in here if you like." Lex told her.

The room was beautifully furnished with carved wood furniture and it was huge twice the size of the rooms at the Manor. Everything in the room looked like it was from the 18th century ( in a good way) and he assumed it was expensive too.

Lex walked over to the bathroom door.

"Chris your room is through there. If you two mind sharing I can find you some other rooms. " He said.

"We don't mind." The said at the same time.

Lex laughed at them again.

"Make yourselves at home. If you'll excuse me I'm late for a meeting." Lex said as he walked out of the room.

Once he was gone Chris sat on the edge of Phoebe's bed he was exhausted.

Phoebe sat beside him and she ruffled his hair.

"Using my hair spray again?" Phoebe said.

"I had to I ran out of product." Chris said.

"So what do you think. " Phoebe asked.

"Of what?" He asked.

She allowed him to lay his head in her lap.

"Of Smallville. Of them." Phoebe said.

"I finally understand them." He said simply.

"You know them in the future?" She asked.

"Just Clark and Lex." He told her.

"Are they still friends." Phoebe asked.

"I don't know. "Chris said.

"So who's Lois? You mentioned her eariler." Phoebe asked.

"She's Clark's friend a reporter and a slayer." Chris said.

"I haven't heard that word in a while." Phoebe said.

"You've never really had to deal with one because until now there was only one or two and now all the potentials have been chosen you could run into one any time." Chris explained.

He knew Phoebe knew about slayers there was a whole page about them in the Book of Shadows.

* * *

"Your friend Lana might be a slayer. That would explain how she took down those two guys today." Phoebe said her hands still playing in his hair.

Chris didn't hear her he was alseep. Phoebe smiled down at her sleeping nephew. It was the first time she'd ever seen him really rest. She knew he needed it. She moved him so he was lying on the bed. She got up and to call her sister.

Phoebe called her sister, "Paige!" and on the fifth yell she actually orbed in.

"What?" Paige demanded impatiently.

Phoebe looked at her younger sister who was dressed in a bathrobe and had a towel on her hair.

Paige looked around.

"Pretty swanky." She said.

"What are you doing here?" Paige asked.

"It's a friends place he's letting me stay with him. Piper didn't tell you?" Phoebe asked.

"Nope. I'm always the last to know everything." Paige said pointedly.

"I am sorry for not telling you about Chris right away would you get over it al ready. I need you to orb me to the manor so I can get a few things. We are going to be staying in Smallville for awhile so we are going to need a change of clothes or things are going to get kind of funky." Phoebe said.

"Okay. Okay. Just for the record I'm not your magical taxi. I was in the middle of a long awaited shower wen you called. I got dosed with some of my own potion at magic school." Paige said.

"Orb now talk later. I want to be back before Chris wakes up." Phoebe said.

Paige looked over at Chris. "He looks so peaceful. "She remarked.

"Probably the only time he isn't scheming." Phoebe said.

" At least we know he is scheming for good now." Paige said .

"We should be so lucky. " Phoebe said.

Paige gave Phoebe an orb back to the manor. Phoebe went to her room and started throwing things into her suitcase. She grabbed the dress that she had started to wear tho her reunion and put it in her suitcase. It would be perfect for the event tomorrow night. She compiled her cutest outfits and cutest shoes into two suit cases.

She managed to roll them down the stairs. She knew Piper had washed some of Chris' clothes and they were in the landry room. She just threw his stuff in a small duffle bag. She was looking for the carrying case to her laptop when Paige came down the stairs now dressed in black tuxedo slacks and tank top.

"I was looking for that out fit." Phoebe said.

Paige ignored her and changed the subject.

"You packed quick." Paige said.

"I was motivated." Phoebe repiled.

"You must have met a guy. "Paige said.

Phoebe blushed and didn't answer.

"Got ahot date tonight?" Paige said.

"If you must know there is a guy who is just going to show me around take me to see the sights. It's very educational." Phoebe told her sister.

"Whatever. How many sights are in a town called Smallville any way. I'm willing to bet one hundred bucks you end up hooking up with this guy before the night ends." Paige said.

"I think I'll pass on that one. "Phoebe said sidestepping her sister and grabbing the carrying case.

"I was right you want him. You think he's sexy. Your going home with him tonight." Paige teased.

"It's not like that. He's sixteen." Phoebe said.

"Ooh jailbait. Even better. " Paige said.

"I'm serious nothing is going to happen." Phoebe said trying to convince herself more than her sister.

"Okay. You got everything. I got to head back to magic school. I'll give you an orb back to your friends." Paige said. Paige orbed Phoebe and all her stuff back to Lex's.

"See ya later sis." Paige said orbing away.


	9. At the first sign of trouble

**AN: Thanx for the reviews. I still don't own these characters but I'm still entertaining them. **

Chapter 9

When Chris woke up he didn't know where he was.

"I was just about to wake you." Phoebe said coming out of the huge bathroom.

She was dressed in a short black pleated skirt and white tank top with a rose pinned to it.

"How long have I been asleep?" He asked.

"About an hour and a half." Phoebe said putting on a necklace.

"Shit. I'm supposed to meet Lana we were going to hang. What time is it?" He asked bolting upright on the bed.

"It's only six. Calm down cowboy." Phoebe said.

Chris was relieved he didn't have to meet her until seven.

"Why are you all dressed up?" He asked.

Phoebe blushed. Chris knew something was up.

"You're going out on a date with Clark?" Chris asked.

"It's a non-date." Phoebe said simply.

"Uh Huh." Chris said cocking an eyebrow.

"What about you and Lana? Is that a date?" Phoebe said.

Chris didn't expect her to turn the tables on him so quickly but he remained composed.

"That definitely is a date." Chris said. Phoebe made a little noise.

A happy noise. "So you like her?"Phoebe asked.

"She's alright. She's cute and funny." Chris said.

"She reminds you of Bianca." Phoebe said.

"What? No." Chris lied.

Lana was a lot like Bianca little things she did the way she said her words it was all so familiar.

"Yeah she does. I saw that far away look you had when she was talking to you. It was like the way you looked at Bianca." Phoebe said.

It still hurt a little to think of Bianca. He couldn't imagine going back to the future and not seeing her there. It was his fault she was dead. Hopefully if he accomplished his mission she wouldn't be dead. But would he know her in his time? He had changed history wrote over it.

He had been in the past for so long he didn't want to leave. He couldn't imagine going back to a world of darkness nor could he imagine polite society in his time. He felt like he belonged in 2004. He got up to get ready to go out.

"Did you bring me some clothes from the Manor?" He asked.

"Of course. I won't have you walking around wearing that all week." Phoebe said.

"We're staying a week?" Chris asked.

"Yeah we could use a vacate. People are getting so sick of you ordering them around at the magic school." Phoebe said.

"Who told you that? Gideon?" Chris asked.

"No like five students told me. You have been bugging everyone about the demon that is after Wyatt and so have I. We need some down time. Leo and Paige can handle things for a week." Phoebe said.

"I guess so." Chris said as he walked into the bathroom.

The door bell rang.

"Okay. Okay he's here he's here." Phoebe said.

"Oh good grief dating a teenager is making you act like one." Chris said.

"Shut up." Phoebe said as she walked out.

Chris showed and dressed in some clothes from the duffle bag Phoebe had packed for him. It wasn't one his snazzier future out fits but the faded Diesel jeans and the button down shirt would do for tonight. It was nearly seven by the time he finished playing with his hair. There was a knock at his door

. He opened it to find a man standing there. He assumed he was a member of Lex's staff.

"Mr. Luthor would like you to know that you are welcome to use any car in the garage if you wish to go out tonight Mr. Haliwell." The man said with Spanish accent.

"Thank you. . ." Chris didn't know his name. "

If you need any thing ring the bell if I can be of any assistance." He said and the he quickly pivoted and walked down the hall.

Chris watched as he disappeared down the hall. Chris went down to the garage to pick out a car. He chose the sliver Jag. Cautiously he drove the car back down town to the Talon.

He hadn't been in town very long but he was able to find his way easily. He went inside and found her waiting. She was wearing a different outfit, a white top and a short blue jean skirt.

"Hey Lana. You look amazing." He said.

"Thanks. You clean up pretty nice yourself." Lana said.

"Ready?" He asked. "As ready as I'll ever be. Something tells me tonight is going to be pretty interesting." Lana said looping her arm through his.

"You know what? I think you're right. Wait to you see the sweet ride Lex lent me." Chris said as they walked out of the coffee shop.

* * *

Phoebe was walking the streets of Smallville hand in hand with Clark Kent and she couldn't remember a time when she felt so free and happy. He was telling her the names of the buildings who own them and what not. He picked up the pace a bit.

"Are you hungry? I know this nice resteraunt on Maple and Fifth. Would you like to go?" Clark asked.

"Sure." Phoebe said giving his hand a little squeeze.

"I know a good short cut." Clark said leading her through an alley.

The restaurant was nice. Phoebe liked the food it was very Italian. Clark was a perfect gentleman all through dinner. They made polite conversation. Both of them were obviously trying not to over flirt.

"You know Phoebe, my parents are out of town tonight ..." Clark let the sentence trail off.

"Save it farm boy." Phoebe said with a smirk.

Clark laughed and for a moment the sexual tension was eased. Clark managed to keep his hands to himself all through dinner. But on the walk back to the Talon he couldn't help himself he grabbed Phoebe and kissed her. She didn't stop him she kissed back and soon they were kissing and groping in a dark alley.

The intense lip lock showed no signs of stopping despite the fact that oxygen were now becoming an issue. Phoebe's hands were on Clark's butt. No one had ever groped him there except the time when he was playing pool with Lex and he spanked him and told him to 'Tighten up.'

"I have a fat ass." He said shyly.

"I like it." Phoebe said.

Phoebe broke off the kiss to work on the buttons of Clark's plaid shirt. Clark opened his eyes to see this big burly guy with a bumpy forehead staring at him.

"Um. Are we in your alley or something?" He asked the man.

Phoebe looked up confused.

"What?" She asked looking up at him.

"Look." He said pointing.

Phoebe turned to see the guy.

"God I hate vampire towns." Phoebe said just before the man grabbed her.

Before Clark could even help Phoebe someone grabbed him and the next thing he knew he was being pinned down by three women with bumpy foreheads like the man's they leaned close to him trying to bite him.

Clark finally understood what Phoebe meant. Those women were vampires and despite the fact that he was a super strong alien prince Clark found himself screaming like a little girl.

Chris and Lana were cruising around in Lex's jag with the top down when Lana heard a shrill scream.

"Chris did you hear that?" She asked.

"Uh Huh." He said parking the car on the corner of Maple.

They heard the scream again this time it was accompanied by some cursing.

"Phoebe." Chris said decisively.

"I've got to go check this out and you might not like how I go." Chris said and then he disappeared in a trail of blue and white light.

"Men." Lana said. "Always running off at the first sign of trouble." She said as she started to run in the direction of the scream.

**Sorry about the cliffhanger.**


	10. Secrets and cemetaries

**AN: Did you guys see the part about Clark's ass. That came out of nowhere the part about Lex telling him to tighten up. I hope u got the joke. My blatant attempt at slashy humor at Lex's expense. Well I still don't own these Characters. But I'm still entertaining them. **

**It's been awhile sorry I've been having so many false starts with my computer at home. So until I get it up and running I'll bang out a few chappys every now and then at work. I continue not to own these characters a fact many of you would find surprising because I continue to play with them with out permission. I know I know I'm a bad girl.**

**Chapter 10**

Lana ran toward the scream any sane person would have probably run down to the Sheriff station. But Lana was a slayer and being a slayer had nothing to do with sanity. She had learned that in the past year along with the skills to hone her slayer power. It was a natural reaction for her to run toward danger instead of away from it. She could feel the adrenaline surge through her body as she ran.

Her slayer senses were heighted there were vampires about and her date was some kind of weird magical creature who had left he stranded. When she finally got to the alley she saw Phoebe fighting a huge vampire guy. Chris was there to he used his telekinesis to get one of the vamps away from Clark who wasn't faring so well. It became obvious to Lana that he was doing the screaming there were still two female vampires on top of him. Lana pulled one off him and slammed her head into a wall.

Clark was having a bon a fide panic attack. He doubted he'd ever been more afraid in his entire life. Not because some nasty she vamps were trying to bite him it was just the realization that vampires were real. He had always thought vamps were something Vincent Price created for Halloween or something not cold and real and right on top of him.

One of the vamps leaned close and bit him and then she screamed and curse about chipping her tooth on him. That was when the blue and white lights appeared and then there was Chris and some how the vamp that was on top of him miraculously flew into a wall.

And then Lana was there pulling one of the vamps of f him. Clark finally remembered who he was and he threw the trashy she vamp off him with all his strength and he stood just in time to see Phoebe leap high into the air and she seemed to hang there for a moment before she kicked the vampy guy in the face.

Clark watched in awe until then another she vamp jumped on his back and rode him to the ground. She was pretty strong but still no match for his strength. He maneuvered her off of him with the simple flick of a wrist and Lana was above him with a wooden stake which plunged into the vampire staking her from the back. She exploded in a pile of dust right before Clark's eyes. Actually some of the dust did get in his eyes.

Once all the vamps had been taken care of they all looked at each other and said, "We need to talk."

Clark spoke first which surprised Phoebe.

"I'll tell you what you want to know once we get back to my house. Some secrets just aren't safe." He said.

Phoebe and Clark trailed behind Lana and Chris as they walked to the Jag.

"So." Lana said once they got into the Jag and Chris was driving.

"What are you guys?" Lana asked.

"Well I could ask you the same thing." Chris replied.

Clark told Chris how to get to the farm. Once they were got there they stood around for the longest five minutes Phoebe had ever experienced. Then Clark spoke up.

"I'm an alien." He said.

"I knew it!" Phoebe shouted.

They all looked at her.

"Sorry. I get a little excited when I find out I'm right about something. Tonight when you kissed me I had a premonition. See I'm a witch and I get premonitions and Chris is my Whitelighter." Phoebe explained.

"Anyways, I saw a space ship." Phoebe told them.

"So you're an alien." Lana said.

"You don't sound shocked." Clark said.

"Not really that explains a lot." Lana said.

"The freaky occurrences that only you know how to deal with. The tornado and everything else. I just wished I would have known sooner. I would have been able to help. Maybe I can help now." Lana said.

Lana turned to Phoebe and Chris. "I figured you two were magical beings. I just didn't know what kind exactly." Lana said.

"Hear that Chris we're magical beings." Phoebe said.

"Well it beats magical freaks." Chris said.

"And let me guess you're a slayer?" Chris stated as he stalked in a circle around Lana.

"All chosen and destiny. Am I right?" Chris asked. "Yeah how do you know about slayers?" She asked.

"I'm from the future I know a lot of things." Chris said coolly.

"You're from the future?" Lana asked.

"Yep and you know what a thousand years from now we'll still be in love." Chris said.

Lana smiled despite the lameness of the pick up line.

She knew he couldn't really be serious about being from the future nobody had magic that strong not even Willow Rosenberg the witch who cast the spell to make Lana and a lot of other girls around the world slayers.

"Now that we all know what's what maybe we can salvage the evening." Chris said.

"It's getting late I need to go do a quick sweep of the cemetery from the looks of things I'm going to have my work cut for me tonight." Lana said.

"I'll come with you. Lend a hand with the slayage. We'll leave these two alone to finish their date." Chris said as he led Lana to the door. "It's not a date." Both Phoebe and Clark shouted behind them.

**

* * *

**

Chris orbed Lana to the cemetery. He supposed they could have gone in the Jag but he wanted to leave Phoebe with an escape route in case farm boy wanted a piece. Chris sat on a head stone while Lana waited for some dead guy to wake up and try to bite her.

"That was fun, what do you call that?" Lana asked.

"Orbing. It's a Whitelighter thing."

"Oh cool." Lana said walking forward and examing a tombstone.

"I didn't even know this kid had died." Lana was saying.

"The families sometimes keep funerals hush hush." Chris said.

She scowled over her shoulder at him.

"How come you know so much?" She asked.

"Like I said I'm from the future." He replied nonchalantly.

She turned her back to the grave and faced him.

"Are you serious?" She asked.

"As a heart attack. I'm from the future and Phoebe's not my sister she's my aunt." Chris said in a rush.

"I've wanted to tell you since I got here. And now that you know my secret I feel better." Chris said.

Lana was looking at him like he had just said that he was the Queen of England.

Finally she closed her mouth and her lips curved into an enticing smirk.

"You've got to be kidding me." She said.

"No I'm not." Chris said just as the newly risen vamp grabbed Lana by the hair.

"Oh Lana by the way there is a vampire behind you." Chris said laughing hysterically as the slayer was pulled down by a surprisingly short vamp.

"Asshole." Lana hissed at Chris before she gave the vamp a sharp elbow in the ribs and a painful stomp to the foot.

He released her and she kicked him in the face and proceeded to wail on him further. Chris watched in awe he wondered how in the world could she fight much less stand in those shoes. It had been a while since he'd seen a slayer in action.

He made a mental note to thank that Californian blonde named Buffy who thought up the idea to make every girl in the world with potential a slayer. Chris was having a nice time watching when he was pushed off the head stone. He landed flat on his back to look up at very pissed off and a very beautiful she vamp. She was wearing her human face but he knew nevertheless that she was a vampire.

"Oh great." Chris murmured getting lost in the spell of her hypnotic eyes.

He came to his senses when he heard Lana shout at him and he orbed away from her. He went digging though Lana's purse for a stake.

"I didn't bring one." Lana croaked from where she was being strangled by the newly risen vamp. He used his telekinesis to get the vamp away from her and Lana ran over to where he was rubbing her throat.

"What kind of a slayer doesn't have a stake?" Chris asked as the two vamps became a calvery.

"The same kind of slayer who wears these shoes on patrol. What was I thinking? I guess I just wanted to show off in front of you. See, Chris it's been two years since I got laid and I was just trying to impress you." Lana said.

"We could stick around her and face death or we could just orb out of here and go do it. And then come back later with Phoebe and Clark and a massive weapons arsenal." Chris offered.

"Okay screw scared duty lets get the hell out of here." Lana said. Chris took her hand and he orbed them out of there and back to his room in the Luthor mansion.


	11. Chris, Lana, and even old people

**AN: There is a more explicit version of this chapter at AdultFanfiction. net so if any one wants to check that out they can. I know no one wants to think about Mr. Mrs. Kent in that capasity but i had too. Since i dont have a beta no one was around to talk me out of it.**

Chapter11 (The less graphic version.)

Chris found himself being pinned to the wall by an unusually aggressive Lana. She was kissing him hard and groping him. She thrust up against him and explored his mouth with her tongue she tasted like coffee. He figured she would seeing as she worked in coffee house. Chris held her face in his hands and returned the kiss. Chris broke off the kiss and went to close the door.

Lana opened it again.

"Someone is going to see." Chris told her.

"Maybe they can learn something." Lana said pulling him to her and nibbling on his ear lobe.

"Oh. . ." Chris moaned.

Lana continued to bite and suck his ear making him crazy with desire. She continued the sharp bites and steamy kisses making a trail down his neck while her hands unbuttoned his shirt.

Chris could not think any more all his blood was rushing to a place that was **_not _**his brain.

Suddenly Lana wasn't touching him any more he opened his eyes to find her peeling off her long sleeved white blouse revealing a white silk camisole underneath. She smiled at him knowing she had his undivided attention and the she pulled the camisole over her head.

She was braless underneath. Her breasts were high and firm but into nearly as large as Bianca's. They intimidated him less. His heart rate increased dramatically at the thought of Bianca.

He was glad about that. He wanted this first time with Lana to be good. Not clumsy and lame like his first time with Bianca had been. He had been so nervous. The fact that a woman like Bianca even gave him the time of day was astonishing to him. Bianca had been with his brother Wyatt who was said to be extraordinary lover.

He had such an inferiority complex when it came to Wyatt. He was always older, stronger, and hotter, more interesting, and he had sex that was rough and killed people. Chris didn't have any of that. But Chris knew he had an edge over Wyatt he knew how many licks. Wyatt just would never do that to please a woman in bed. He wasn't exactly a giver. He decided to start with that.

* * *

When Lex got home from his meeting he went to his study. In the hallway he heard moans and shouts coming from one of the bedrooms on that floor.

He heard a woman moaning, "Oh My God Clark." He paused in the hallway to listen.

And he noticed being the keen observer he was that Chris' bedroom door was open. His curiosity got the best of him and he peeked inside. What he saw was astonishing. It was Chris and Lana having sex. And she wascalling him _**Clark**_ He knew he couldn't take standing there and watching so he went back down the hall to his study. The moment he stepped inside his phone rang.

* * *

"I want to show you something," Clark told Phoebe.

"What?" She asked intrigued.

"Close your eyes." Clark said.

Phoebe did as she was told and the next thing she knew she was being thrown over his shoulder and they were moving fast.

"Very original you tell me to close my eyes and you wisk me off to your bedroom that so original." She said. He sat her back on her feet. She looked around and noticed they were in this big ass loft.

"It's my Fortress of Solitude. Not my bedroom. Honestly Phoebe what kind of guy do you think I am?" Clark asked.

"Technically you aren't a guy at all. Which is a good thing because I personally feel normal guys are overrated." Phoebe said.

Clark smiled his patented million dollar smile at her and she started to feel weak in the knees.

"Anyway this is where I come to think and look at the stars." Clark told her.

"Do you know which one you came from?" Phoebe said

"Yes. I found out last year." Clark told her and then, motioned for her to have a seat she took his hand and she started to get a premonition.

She saw a man with white hair he was well built and he looked a lot like Clark probably would when he got older and a woman with long dark hair put an infant into what could only be described as a space ship a mist a whole lot of chaos people screaming and running and what looked like an earthquake. The woman was over come with sobs by the time the man three the small ship with all his strength which was a way lot. And the tiny boy came barreling toward Earth just as his home planet exploded into a million pieces.

Phoebe's eyes opened once the vision was over.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yeah I had a premonition." She told him every detail of it and then he told her his story.

"Fourteen years ago I arrived on Earth." Clark started.

"The day of the meteors." Phoebe said.

"Yeah. My parents didn't tell me until two years ago when Lex ran me over with his Porsche and I saved his life. I asked my father the same questions about the abilities I've had all my life and he finally gave me a straight answer." Clark told her.

"My planet doesn't exist any more as you know. But there's these caves with these ancient Kryptonian paintings, Krypton, that's the name of my planet." Clark told her.

"Your friend Pete mentioned something about those gang members smoking Krypto- something. Was the green smoke a result of them smoking the meteor fragments?" Phoebe asked.

"They were smoking Kryptonite that's why I got sick." Clark said.

"It makes sense. Do you think those guy will come after us?" Phoebe asked.

"No not if Pete and Chloe keep there noses out of other people's drug deals I doubt they'll come after us after how Lana beat the crap out of those two guys I don't think so." Clark said.

"Being in a gang is all about pride once you lose you'll do anything to gain the respect of the crew." Phoebe said.

"You think they might attack again?" Clark asked her.

"I don't know we'd better be ready just in case." Phoebe said.

"Ever made a potion before?" She asked.

"I had no idea magic was real till I met you." Clark said

"That is either really sappy or your trying to get in my pants." Phoebe said.

"Why can't it be both?" Clark asked.

Phoebe could feel the change in Clark's feeling the lust the pain from telling his story dissipating. She wanted him so bad then.

"Clark if you don't kiss me right now I'll -" Phoebe was cut off when Clark fiercely kissed her and took her in his arms.

Phoebe maneuvered him onto his back. She straddled him.

"Mmm." Clark moaned breaking off the kiss.

"Maybe we should take this to my bedroom. Anyone can walk in out here." Clark said.

"Okay." Phoebe relented she was going to have sex with a sixteen year old boy she had had worse things done to her when she was sixteen so she stopped thinking about it and let Clark pick her up and super speed both of them into the house.

"You go so fast. "Phoebe said wrapping her legs around him tighter.

She saw that they were in his house downstairs.

The Thong Song was playing in the background.

"I didn't turn on the radio." Clark said.

A minute later an older blond man danced into the room wearing a black leather vest and baggy leather pants. And then a red haired woman danced in wearing only a red thong.

"Mom! Dad!" Clark squeaked Phoebe could see the shock on his face and feel it as well. Clark's parents turned and saw them.

"Clark." They both said in unison.

He put Phoebe down and his mother hid behind his father who said casually,

"Who's your friend." Phoebe and Clark were both so mortified then.

Phoebe knew it wasn't the first time Clark had been confronted with the twisted sexual side of his parent's marriage.

"Phoebe I would like you to meet my parents, Sisqo and Lil' Kim. If you'll excuse me I'm just going to take Phoebe home and I'll see you two tomorrow and we won't ever talk about this again okay." Clark said as he took Phoebe by the hand and led her to the door.

Neither of Clark's parents said anything.

"Chris must have orbed Lana wherever they went and he left me Lex's Jag." Phoebe said changing the subject.

She knew Clark didn't want to talk about his parents kinky sex games and she could feel his arousal dissipating and his embarrassment linger.

"You can drive we'll go for a ride okay." Phoebe said.

"I'm sorry about that." Clark said.

"It's okay." Phoebe said once they were in the car.

"I hate to even think about them getting it on. They are so _old._" Clark said

Phoebe laughed, "Even old people like kink some times." She said.

"I caught them in the barn once." Clark told her.

"You remember that Kenny Chesney song 'She thinks my tractor is sexy'?" Clark asked.

Phoebe nodded and then she got the visual and it was less funny.


	12. A gentleman never tells ANYTHING

**AN: Thanx for the reviews. You know I don't own them. The entire Chapter 16 can be found at adult because of the NC-17 rating. It will explain who Sam is and why Chris is dreaming of him**

Chapter 17

When Chris woke up he was extremely thirsty. He looked around the dark room for his boxers slid on his boxers and walked out of the open door and went in search of the kitchen he was also ravenously hungry. He had forgotten they'd even left it open. He was sure some of Lex's staff probably got an earful if such a thing was possible. He started down the hall but he heard what sounded like moans coming from a television that was on. He had dreamt about Sam again and the days when they were younger. He wished he could have saved him. He wished Sam would have kissed him sooner and he wished for more time with him. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and felt his face was wet. He must have cried in his sleep again.

Curious he followed the sound to an office and he found Lex watching this big ass flat screen plasma TV. They didn't even have one of those at the Manor in his time. "What's up?" Chris said from where he leaned against the door frame. "Nothing I'm just watching some TV." Lex said nonchalantly pressing a button on the remote quickly. Chris had already seen the porn he had been watching and he made a mental note to find that later.

"I didn't wake you did I?" Lex asked. "No." Chris said. "You can come in here if you want." Lex said. Chris walked into the room. "So catching up on your soaps?" Chris asked with a smirk as he sat down on the couch beside Lex. Lex gave him a look. "You got laid tonight I didn't." Lex said. "You heard us!" Chris asked. Lex nodded. He sighed deeply. "Sorry did we disturb you or gross you out or anything?" Chris asked. Lex shook his head. "I can't I left the door open and you heard us." Chris shook his head in frustration. "I'm over it. So you were in here jerking off?" Chris asked changing the subject. "I was about to." Lex said.

Chris was shocked he didn't think a guy as rich and handsome as was Lex would have to sit alone in the dark and jerk off to bad porn. Just the thought of Lex sitting in the dark jerking off made Chris start to get a little hot. "Really?" Chris asked. Lex nodded. "I thought guys like you and JFK paid hookers or showgirls to get off with." Chris said. Lex laughed. "I want something more than just a good fuck." Lex said.

"Sometimes a good fuck is enough." Chris said. "Have you ever made love to some one you had a deep connection with?" Lex asked. Chris nodded. "I haven't." Lex was doing that thing again. That thing where he locked eyes with Chris and he could never seem to break the gaze. He was just falling into Lex's blue green eyes. He could feel the pounding of his own heart. Being near Lex awakened feelings he thought were dead buried. Feelings he thought died with Sam and Bianca. He so needed to get the hell out of there But he just couldn't leave him alone.

Lex finally shifted his gaze. He tried not to reach over and grab Chris and kiss him. He managed to restrain himself. He knew the boy was straight. He had heard him fucking Smallville's Fairy princess in the next room. He felt the familiar twinge of jealously toward Lana that he often felt when Clark gushed about her. "If you want to finish whatever… you were going to do. I'm going to go find some snacks. We sort of skipped dinner." Chris said standing and stretching giving Lex the opportunity to admire his half naked form.

"You got Lana to have sex with you without even buying her dinner?" Lex asked shocked but his shock didn't stop him from checking Chris out. Tall and lean. Smooth pale skin over hard muscle. Chris had a remarkable six pack though Lex doubted he even worked out. He was surprised to find out Chris and Lana were having sex. He was even more surprised that they had left the door open. He never looked in it but he had heard plenty from down the hall. He had always thought Lana was some sort of prude. He was astonished enough to find out she was going at it with a dude she just met. But he didn't even buy her dinner first.

"She owed me. She nearly got me killed twice." Chris said. "That dirty whore. I didn't think she had it in her." Lex said chuckling. "She's a real freak she is the one who suggested we leave the door open." Chris said. "Lana Lang. Exhibitionist. Who would have thunk it?" Lex said. "So how was it?" Lex asked. "A gentleman never tells." Chris said as he walked over to the door. "That means **_you _**can tell me." Lex said. Chris turned back to face him with a mischievous smirk on his gorgeous face.

"Sorry I turned the wrong phrase. I'm not allowed to disclose the intimate and erotic details of what happened in that bedroom tonight. You'll just have to wait like everyone else until it comes out on DVD." Chris said and then he turned and stalked out of the room and down the hall. Lex smiled to himself when Chris returned. "I just remembered I have no idea where the kitchen is. Could you show me?" Chris asked he sounded like a shy little boy and looked like one too with his dark hair falling into those amazing eyes of his.

"Yeah sure." Lex said. He followed Chris out into the hallway and then he led the way to the kitchen. "The most of the staff goes home for the night. Except for my security. If you want I can make you something." Lex said. "I think I can manage. But I'll need some help and Phoebe is my kitchen buddy and she hasn't got in yet would you mind subbing?" Chris asked.

"Aren't you going to let me know what we are making?" Lex asked after five minutes of hunting for whatever ingredients Chris asked for. "Breakfast. What the hell else would we be making at 5 a fucking clock in the morning?" Chris asked. "With you things are never normal." Lex said bending over to look for a skillet for Chris to make omelets in.

"There are a ton of skillets under here which one did you say you wanted?" Lex asked with his head halfway in a cabinet. Chris was staring at his ass in those black silk pj bottoms and damming himself for doing so. "Preferably a medium sized Stainless steel pan." Chris said remembering what he was supposed to be doing. He turned over bacon that was sizzling in another pan.

It wasn't long before Chris had prepared enough food for twenty people. Lex watched in awe. Chris hadn't really needed his help except for to locate cook ware and utensils most of which Lex had no earthly idea where find. "How'd you become such a culinary genius?" Lex asked. "My mom was a chef." Chris replied the words were clipped detached and yet so full of feeling. Lex looked at Chris but Chris didn't meet his eyes.

He wanted to avoid the subject but he was just as curious as Chloe could be sometimes when she pumped him for information about his mother. "What happened to her?" Lex asked. Chris turned to face him. There was hurt in his clear green eyes which Lex had noticed in the short time he had known him could change from blue to a stormy green depending on his mood. There was pancake batter on his cheek. Lex wanted to reach out and wipe it away more than he'd ever wanted anything at that moment.

"Nothing yet." Chris said turning back to his work at the stove. Lex didn't completely understand but he knew well enough to leave it alone. Chris turned the stove off and looked at Lex again this time in the eye. There was something there something he wanted to say. Chris shook his head. "Do you have strawberries? I think this would work with strawberries." Chris said. The words had more feeling than the ones before it. Lex could not understand this boy.

He had no idea how old Chris was whenever he thought he had an accurate guess Chris said or did something else that either lowered or raised Lex's estimate. Before he knew it Lex was reaching out and touching Chris' cheek wiping away flour there. Chris closed his eyes and leaned into the touch but then the sound of a loud yawn startled them both.

"Do either of you have the slightest inkling of an idea what time it is?"

They both turned to see Lana who was clad in only a white camisole that was practically see through and some white panties. "Normal people are asleep at this time." She told them. "Ooh food." She moaned. "Just hang on a second Missy. I am not finished yet you and go and wait for me to serve you in the dining room." Chris said. "Okay." Lana said as she stalked out of the room. Her skimpy lace boy shorts didn't cover much. "Nice glutes." Lex said as he followed her out.


	13. Sparkage

Chapter 13

Clark and Phoebe drove around town just talking for hours. Phoebe didn't know so much time had passed until they noticed the sun was coming up.

"That's Chloe's car at Pete's." Clark said as they drove by a blue farm house.

"Do you think she spent the night there?" Phoebe asked. "I don't know it looks like." Clark said.

"Would that be a bad thing? I sensed that Pete was having trouble…" Phoebe stopped because Clark was giving her a look.

"I told you sometimes I feel what other people feel. And I could feel what Pete felt when I was around him today." Phoebe said.

"Can you do that with everyone?" Clark asked.

"You want to know if I can read you. I can most of the time." Phoebe said.

"I knew a telapath once." Clark whispered.

"Even Lex?" Clark asked arching an eyebrow.

"Yep. I'm all feelings all the time." Phoebe said.

"Must be tough. I got the whole super hearing thing which is pretty annoying I can't imagine feeling what everyone else is feeling." Clark said.

"Super hearing. Super strength. And super speed. What else you got that's super." Phoebe asked cocking an eyebrow. Clark blushed

. "I can see through things too." Clark admitted.

"X-ray vision?" Phoebe asked intrigued.

They had discussed his powers earlier but he hadn't mentioned these.

"You don't believe me." Clark said.

"Who's the Empath here?" Phoebe said. Clark smiled at her.

"Okay prove it. What color is my bra?" Phoebe said.

Clark looked at her shocked for a moment.

"It's black Phoebe I totally saw the strap. You are wearing a tank top you know." He told her.

"Okay what kind of underwear am I wearing?" Phoebe said.

"You are not going to let this go are you?" Clark said.

"No." Phoebe said grinning from ear to ear.

"Fine." Clark said as he lowered his eyes and focused in on Phoebe's lap.

Then he looked back up at her. "Pink." He said.

"With this little white ribbon on the front. I think they're thongs." Clark told her.

Phoebe was gaping at him in shock.

"Any more brain busters?" Clark asked.

"If you really want to know what your friends are doing I suggest we turn back and you use your X-ray vision to find out." Phoebe said.

"What if they are doing something I don't want to see?" Clark asked.

Phoebe shrugged.

"It's a total invasion of privacy." Clark said as he turned the truck around and headed back to Pete's house.

"They probably fell asleep watching a movie or something." Clark said as he pulled up in the drive way.

Pete's car, Chloe's beetle and Pete's dad's truck were all parked in various places in drive way but Clark didn't see Pete's mom's SUV.

Clark dug in his pocket for his phone.

"I'm gonna call him and see if they want to go over to Lex's." Clark said opening his flip phone and pressing a button.

Pete answered on like the fifth ring.

"Hello." Pete said sounding like he had been asleep.

"Hey man. I just wanted to see if you and Chloe want to go to Lex's this morning." Clark asked.

"How in the hell do you know Chloe's here?" Pete asked.

"I'm in the driveway. And since you brought it up. Did she spend the night?" Clark asked.

"It's too early in the damn morning for the inquisition." Pete replied.

"Hold on a sec." Pete said.

He could hear Chloe mumble something. He didn't bother using his super hearing to catch it.

"You want to go over to Lex's with Clark?" Clark heard Pete asked her.

"Yeah sure." He heard Chloe reply.

"We're coming down just give us a few minutes,"

"Take all the time you need." Clark said with a smirk.

"Tell Clark I heard that. Don't make me have to come out there and make me break my foot off in his ass." Chloe said loud enough for Clark to hear with out his super hearing.

"Bye guys see ya in a few." Clark said hanging up. "So are they coming?" Phoebe asked. "Yeah they are on their way down now." Clark said.

Ten minutes later Pete and Chloe came out of the house. Chloe was the first one to walk over to the Jag.

"Sweet ride." Chloe said leaning into the driver's side window.

"Hey Phoebe." She said waving.

"Hey." Phoebe said back.

Pete came over next.

"Maybe I should have asked you what you did last night." Pete said and Clark blushed Phoebe took his hand.

"You guys riding with us or you going in your car?" Clark asked.

"I'll drive." Chloe said as she turned and headed over to her car.

"She always has to be the one doing everything." Pete said.

"I bet." Clark said.

Chloe scowled at them as she opened the driver's side door. "Don't make me come over there Clark." Chloe said.

"You need to put your woman in check." Clark said stuttering a little.

He knew if any of his friends could kick his ass it would be Chloe.

"You put her in check." Pete said.

"She's your woman." Clark told him.

Chloe honked the horn. "Damn woman. I can't talk to nobody for you over there honking the horn." Pete grumbled as he started over to Chloe's car.

When they got to Lex's a member of his staff directed them to the dining room where Chris, Lana, and Lex were sitting around the table with an insane amount of food. Clark, Phoebe, Chloe, and Pete burst out laughing at the sight of them.

Lana looked like she had what Clark thought was a dead cat on her head. Lex had something red around his mouth Clark hoped it was strawberry jam. Chris had pancake batter on various parts of his face. And they were all in various states of undress. The guys were both shirt less and Lana wore a partially see through camisole and not much else. Clark wondered what they had been up to last night.

He looked at Phoebe and he knew she was thinking the same thing.

"Hey!" Chris shouted with a mouth full of food.

"You guys hungry? There's more than enough for everyone." Chris said.

"Your cook sure laid out a spread." Pete said as he pulled out a chair and sat down in it.

"Actually Chris made breakfast this morning." Lex said.

Clark pulled out a chair and motioned for Phoebe to sit.

Chloe was still standing watching with Clark with abject envy.

She stood behind Pete who was already eating and cleared her throat loudly. Pete ignored her until Lana kicked him under the table.

"Shit. What you do that for?" Pete asked finally.

Lana scowled at him. Clark tried not to laugh when he pointed to Chloe who was by then seething.

Pete looked at her and said, "What? She ain't nobody."

Chloe huffed and smacked Pete upside the head. She pulled out her own chair. Clark and everyone at the table who were not Pete and Chloe burst out laughing.

Once the laugher died down Pete asked Lana, "So, how are you and your Seabiscuit feeling this morning?" He asked just as politely as he knew how.

"What?" She asked having no idea what he meant.

"That thing on your head." Pete said.

Clark looked like he was trying not to laugh. Phoebe clamped a hand over her mouth. Lex was smirking. Chris had his mouth hanging open in shock and Chloe burst out laughing.

Lana grabbed a sliver serving tray andused it asa mirror. Her hair was a disaster.

She felt her cheeks glow red and then she realized how funny she looked and laughed with the others, "Why didn't you tell me my hair was looking this bad?" She asked Chris.

He shrugged his shoulders and said, "I thought it was sexy."

Lana rolled her eyes and snorted.

Chris made slightly obscene gestures at her and blew kisses. Lana notice how Phoebe leaned in to whisper something to Clark and Lex shook his head. Pete and Chloe were eating too hard to notice anything.

Phoebe knew something had happened between Chris and Lana. She didn't need to be an empath to know that. Pete and Chloe were hilarious. She had been laughing to hard to really eat. She took a bite of pancakes. They were really good.

"These are really good. You are your mother's son you made these from scratch didn't you?" Phoebe asked. Chris nodded.

"Lex couldn't find the pancake mix." Chris told her.

"I told you I don't cook I rarely go into the kitchen. How am I supposed to know where Maureen keeps the pancake mix?" Lex said.

"You could have at least checked the cupboards." Chris said.

Phoebe enjoyed the way they argued like and old married couple.

"Maybe I would have if you wouldn't have had me bent over for half the morning…" Lex stopped in mid sentence because everyone was looking at him.

"That sentence started out in a different place than it ended up." He offered blushing a little.

Phoebe glanced over at Chris who was blushing as well.

She wondered if she was mistaken or was there sparkage between those two. She didn't know what to think Chris was all over the freaking place. Flirting with Lana flirting with Lex. She could never get a read on him any ways.


	14. Miss Halliwell are you trying to seduce

Chapter 14

Lex suggested that they go shopping for the event in Metropolis. Chris admitted that he had no tux. Lana had yet to pick up her dress. Pete had to go pick up his tux Chloe didn't even have a dress to wear. Phoebe wanted a new one.

Chloe and Pete went home to get dressed. Clark and Phoebe were doing the dishes for some reason unknown to Lex. Chris and Lana had gone up stairs. Lex assumed they were taking a shower.

Lex went upstairs to get ready. He ignored the moans coming from down the hall. He showered and dressed one of his more unusual outfits jeans and Ralph Lauren shirt. He went downstairs again to find Clark and Phoebe gone and his kitchen cleaned.

* * *

Phoebe like the way Lex's Jag handled.

"I've got to get myself one of these." She told Clark as she pulled into his drive way.

"It really is a nice car." Clark said. Phoebe put it in park and turned off the engine.

"I know you're nervous about the benefit tonight." Phoebe told him.

"Yeah. When I got to charity benefits things tend to go bad. Real bad." He told her.

"How bad could it be? We'll get dressed up have dinner talk about the snobby rich bastards behind their backs it will be fun." Phoebe said

"The last time I went to one of these things I got hit by a bus. Not like it hurt or anything but thing's got kind of complicated afterwards." Clark said.

"Do you make a habit out of getting hit by moving vehicles or is it a natural talent?" She asked.

He shrugged.

"Look nothing out of the ordinary is going to happen. It will be fun I promise. I'll make it worth your while." Phoebe said in a seductive tone.

"Why Miss Halliwell are you trying to seduce me?" Clark asked.

"Depends. Are you seducible?" She asked.

"I doubt that's even a real word…" Clark's statement is cut off when Phoebe leaned over and kissed him.

She kissed him hard and deep for just a second and then she pulled back leaving him wanting more.

"You'll go?" Phoebe asked. Clark nodded and tried to kiss her again.

"I'll be there with bells on." He said finally.

"I'd settle for a tux and if you like the bells idea so much maybe afterwards we can …." Phoebe said.

"Don't push it." Clark said as he leaned in to kiss her.


	15. It's on like Donkey Kong

**AN: Warning light Chloe bashing in this chapter. But some Lex and Chris smoochies for your personal enjoyment! Some Chlete and a lot of Phlark. A little Chris and Lana at the beginning I hope you like.**

Chapter 21

It had taken so long for everyone to get ready to go. Chris and Lana had done so much by the time Phoebe was finished getting dressed and Lex finished his paper work. Even after that they still had to wait for Pete, Clark, and Chloe. Chris had a short attention span.

He had took a shower with Lana orbed her back to Chloe's house so she could get changed; he hung out for a while there while she got dressed.

Chloe had opened the door on him while Lana was in the shower. She'd made some snarky comment and Chris just gave her the finger. She returned the gesture and left the room. He smiled to himself as she left the room. He really didn't like Chloe she reminded him too much of a girl he had known in high school.

He was thumbing through Lana's yearbook when Chloe had interrupted. He went back to looking at the pictures and mentally making fun of Lana's classmates. He saw Chloe's picture and he wanted to draw a mustache on her but it looked like she already had one. He was snickering about it when Lana came in still wearing a towel.

"You'd better be glad Gabe didn't come in here." Lana told him as she closed and locked the door. "Who the hell is Gabe?" Chris asked. "Chloe's dad. He um lost his job and he's passed out on the couch from drinking all night." Lana revealed.

"So why are you living here? I know you don't have any family near by but there's a space above the Talon that could make a cute apartment." Chris said.

Lana winced at the mention of the apartment over the Talon.

"I…" Lana started. "It's not any of my business. I understand if you don't want to talk about it." Chris said. Lana started to shake out her wet hair it was wet from the shower they had taken at Lex's. Chris had orbed them into Lana's bedroom.

"I know a way to dry your hair." Chris said as he walked over and pulled Lana to him. "Oh really." Lana said as she took off her towel and threw it at him.

* * *

Once everyone reconvened at Lex's they split up taking two cars. Clark and Phoebe rode with Pete and Chloe in Pete's old school convertible and Lex was tailing them with Chris and Lana in the Jag. And Lana's hair was still wet. Which she didn't mind because Lex had the top down.

Chris had wanted to ride up front for reasons unknown to Lana. She wondered fleetingly if he was getting tired of her. They had sex a bunch of times that morning. She sighed and put her insecure thoughts on the back burner. She was very sleepy and she had the whole back seat to herself.

She stretched out curling up on her side. Her back hurt for reasons direct or indirectly relating to all the sex she had been having with Chris. It could have been from when that vamp threw her against the headstone. She closed her eyes and tried to sleep.

"Is that Lana snoring?" Lex asked. "Yep. She drools too and steals the freaking covers." Chris said. "Too much information." Lex said chuckling. Chris was rifling through Lex's CD collection. "Do you have anything more upbeat? Smashing Pumpkins? What's that?" Chris asked.

"Where's the Outcast? I wanna hear 'Roses' I haven't heard that in forever. "Keep flipping." Lex told him. "You actually have Speakerboxx and the Love Below!" Chris asked once he had found the CD. Lex nodded, "I can get down with the get down. You know."

"But your Lex Luthor you're supposed to be all angst metal or straight classical." Chris said shaking his head and frowning in confusion. He had Lex pegged all wrong.

"People can surprise you." Lex said. "Ain't it the truth?" Chris said. "Though I prefer 'The Way U Move' 'Roses' is still a great song." Lex said. "I still can't believe you listen to Outcast." Chris said still shaking his head. "Well, I still can't believe you had sex with Smallville's fairy princess on your first night in town." Lex said shaking his head in disbelief.

"Don't be hating." Chris told Lex and he put the CD in the CD player. The song started. "Caroline. Caroline. All the guys would say she's mighty fine. But mighty fine only got you somewhere half the time. And the other half either got you cursed out, or coming up short Yeah, now dig this, even though

You'd need a golden calculator to divide. The time it took to look inside and realize that. Real guys go for real down to Mars girls, yeah!" Both Chris and Lex were singing.

* * *

Clark was sitting in the backseat of Pete's car snuggling with Phoebe. They were trying to ignore Chloe and Pete's argument and catch a few Z's. After the first twenty minutes the noise from the front seat seemed to be comforting and soothing them to sleep.

Clark was dozing in and out to make sure the argument didn't lose it playful nature. Pete was saying, "I don't want us to end up like my parents." "We won't." Chloe responded. "But when we fight we sound just like them." Pete said. "Technically we're not really fighting it's kind of foreplay for us." Chloe said.

"Oh yeah. For a second and a half I forgot that were both so damaged that we get off on verbal abuse." Pete said. "Okay then. Tell me to shut the hell up and things can get back to normal. Well as normal as they can in Smallville and our relationship." Chloe said.

"Shut the hell up woman." Pete said. Clark watched and listened in horror as Chloe leaned over and gave Pete a peck on the cheek. Pete hadn't told him that his parents were fighting. And Chloe and Pete did do something last night. Clark tried to go back to sleep but this overwhelming sense of ickyness remained.

* * *

Phoebe had officially heard and seen it all after seeing the way Pete and Chloe were together. She had tried not to ease drop but her damn empathy was working over time. She could feel the confusion and the anger Pete felt about his parents. She could feel the sick attraction between the two teenagers.

She didn't like it. She sighed and pressed herself closer to Clark. He was so warm and real and he smelled so nice. The way he was sitting made his jeans gather up at one place and Phoebe didn't know if he was hard from the way she was pressing into him or Chloe and Pete's convo. There was only one way to find out. She leaned up moving away from him a bit and leaning up to kiss him on the lips.

* * *

Clark's erection was fading fast after hearing Chloe and Pete's convo but when Phoebe kissed him it returned with a vengeance. He felt Phoebe's small hand slide down his chest and right into his pants. Clark bit his lip to suppress a moan.

"Phoebe I don't think we should-" Clark's protest was cut short when Pete suddenly hit the brakes and Clark held Phoebe against him not allowing them to slam forward with the car.

And the warm Phoebe hand was gone and she was looking out of the car. "What the fuck is Lex doing?" Pete asked. "Whatever it is it isn't legal this is a no passing zone." Phoebe said. Clark turned a little to see what the other three were looking at.

Lex had the top down on his Jag and Chris was doing something rather obscene in the from the passenger seat. Phoebe squeaked at the sight. Clark shook his head. He really didn't need to see another guy's ass at nine o' clock in the morning.

"Oh it's on like Donkey Kong." Chloe said as she started to do what looked to Clark like she was unbuttoning her skirt. Pete sped up to pass Lex's car. Clark and Phoebe watched in horror as Chloe pulled down her skirt and stood up in the seat.

* * *

Pete had the top down and Lex and Chris got a full view of Chloe's ass. The raging hard on he got from seeing Chris pull his pants down disappeared quickly when Chloe returned fire. Chris made a noise that sounded like he was gagging.

Chloe's ass wasn't _that _bad it was just that she was a _girl_. Lex finally admitted that fact to himself. "What do ya think about that b-otch?" Pete shouted as he finally passed them after driving along side for a few horrible minutes.

"No way are they getting away with that." Chris said. "I'm gonna have nightmares about that for weeks." Chris said. "What do you propose we do about it?" Lex asked. He glanced over at Chris who had mischievous grin on his face.

Lex shook his head he knew whatever Chris was thinking it wasn't good. "Oh no, what are you going to do?" Lex asked more worried when he saw the proverbial wheels begin to turn in Chris' head. Then when Chris went into a maniacal fit of laughter all bets were off he was going to do something crazy.

* * *

Chris told Lex his plan. "It's easy simple. I'm going to be doing all the work." Chris said trying to convince Lex. "How I'm I supposed to do _that _and drive at the same time?" Lex asked. "A man with your reputation I figured you would have done this ten times over." Chris said cocking an eyebrow.

Lex blushed. Chris had him and he knew it. Then Lex went from embarrassed to exasperated. "Why can't you just wave slong out the window like a normal hooligan?" Lex asked sounding frustrated.

Chris started to say something snarky to Lex but he remembered that you get more with sugar than with vinegar. "Please Lex. I would think that you would want to do this with me." Chris said giving Lex the puppy eyes.

"Of course I want to do this with you but not like this not because of some prank." Lex told him. Chris sighed. "What if I told you that I kind of wanted to make out with you too?" He said in rush. Lex looked shocked for moment and didn't say anything.

"My friends… don't know that I…" Lex started. "That you like men. I think they know." Chris said. "How would they… I'm I obvious or something?" Lex asked. "Dude everyone knows." Chris said doing his best imitation of his aunt Paige.

"I'll have you know that I'm quite the ladies man." Lex said. "Did you say 'lady man'?" Chris asked. Lex playfully hit him on the shoulder. "I've been married two times." Lex told him. "To money grubbing whores out for your money? I bet they probably tried to kill you to get it." Chris said.

Chris saw how Lex's expression changed and grew dark and troubled. "Say you'll do it the red light is coming up it'll be just like that scene in dude where my car. You'll rev your engine. Pete will rev his and put his arm around Chloe and then you'll put your arm around me. They'll go for the kiss and we'll go for the kiss. They can't beat that." Chris said.

* * *

"I can't believe Chris and Lex haven't retaliated yet." Clark said. "They will." Phoebe predicted. "I think I won. A girl mooning trumps a guy mooning right?" Chloe asked. "Well in any case let me assure you in saying you haven't seen the last of those two or Chris's ass." Phoebe said.

"What are you like a crystal ball are something?" Pete asked braking at the red light. "Yeah she's special alright." Clark said. "No I mean. Lex just pulled up beside me and he's revving his engine." Pete said. "I think you should rev it up too Pete." Chloe said not wanting to be outdone.

Pete revved his engine then he put his arm around Chloe. They all watched as Lex put his arm around Chris. "I think you should kiss me Pete." Chloe suggested. Pete did as he was told. Phoebe and Clark kept watching Lex and Chris and sure enough they kissed too. But longer it was longer and it was way hotter than Chloe and Pete's kiss.

And it went way beyond just kissing there were several degrees of groping as well. Clark watched and he tried and failed in not getting turned on by the display. He had suspected Lex was gay for a while now. But the proof was rather… arousing.

Chloe and Pete didn't seem shocked only outdone. Chloe huffed and hollered out the window, "Fine you win." Phoebe was smiling. "You go boy." She hollered out the window. "Guys the light's been green for like three minutes and Chloe said you won." Clark hollered after another minute.


	16. Mall Rats

**Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews. I wanted to get this chapter out sooner but I was bombarded by ideas for other stories. But here is the 22nd installment of the epic adventure Witch Hunt. **

Chapter 16

Lex was still reeling from the kiss at the red light. He couldn't believe Chris was getting to him like this. He was totally open. There was no other word to describe how he felt. Usually Lex had a keen eye for detail but when he was around Chris the only details he was noticing were the details of his body.

He had an excellent memory too. He kept wondering was there something he was forgetting but he shrugged it off. After twenty minutes of searching for two parking spaces side by side. Lex finally parked beside Pete.

Lex hated the Metropolis Mall for the obvious reasons but Giorgio his favorite tailor (the one that did not fondle his package at every fitting) had relocated.

Chris' hand was gripping his thigh as he leaned over and whispered, "I've been hard every since you kissed me."

Lex groaned at the degree of sensuality in Chris' voice. He wanted to take him right then. But Lana was his girl he couldn't do that to her.

"Aren't you going to wake up Sleeping Booty in the backseat?" Lex asked.

Chris blushed at the mention of Lana.

* * *

Lana woke up when she felt the car come to a stop. She heard Lex call her sleeping booty and she couldn't help but reply back. She sat up straight to find out her back didn't feel any better it only hurt worse.

She groaned audibly both men in the front seat turned to look at her.

"Lana are you alright?" Chris asked. "I'm fine my back hurts a little." Lana said. Saying that it hurt a little was the understatement of a century.

"Do you think you can move?" Lex asked with genuine concern in his eyes a rarity for him.

"I think so." Lana said.

Chris got out of the car pulled the seat up and helped her out.

"Thanks."

"Let me take a look at that. I know I have the tendency to blow backs out but this is ridiculous." Chris said and he was lifting up the back of her shirt before she could answer.

Chris made a shocked noise but told her nothing.

Lex was out of the car a few seconds later inspecting it as well.

"You blow backs out?" Lex snorted. Lana didn't have to look at him to know he was smirking like the devil himself.

"Did the two of you by any chance have sex on someone's headstone?" Lex asked.

"No." Chris said.

"I got thrown into one last night though." Lana said.

"I won't inquire about your kinky four play. But you have a bruise on your back with the date of birth and the date of death for some guy named Charles." Lex said.

"I have some pills in my dash that will make you feel fine and dandy in a few minutes." Lex said.

"You might not want to do that." Chris said.

"Why not she's obviously in pain and the others have gone on with out us." Lex said digging through the dash.

"Yeah why not?" Lana said feeling gypped she was always willing to try a new drug.

"Because. Because I said so okay. I have a pretty good idea what kind of pills you have in there Lex. You shouldn't give out powerful muscle relaxers to a minor." Chris said.

"Chris, I think you've got me all wrong. I don't have powerful muscle relaxers I have the X that I give out to my employees at Halloween. I would never pull something as low and underhanded like give a teenage girl muscle relaxers ." Lex said sounding hurt.

Chris and Lana laughed.

"Actually it's Aspirin with Codeine in it. But if you're looking for drugs you won't find any in my car." Lex said.

Lana pouted.

"Here." Lex said handing her the pills.

"But I don't have anything to drink with them." Lana said.

"Did you think I would forget about that?" Lex asked handing her a sliver flask.

She took it and Chris raised an eyebrow at it's questionable contents. She opened it and took a sip taking her pills.

"Vodka." She said a second after swallowing.

Lex hit a button his keys and the top went up and the doors locked.

"Come on we need to catch up with the others" Lex said.

* * *

The others were easier to spot than Chris expected. They were all standing in a big cluster near the entrance gaping at something. Chris walked directly behind Phoebe.

"What ya doing?" He asked.

She jumped and turned around.

"Chris! You scared me." She said.

"What's going on?" Chris asked.

"They're setting up for a live T.V. show but they won't tell us which one it is. Chloe is over there trying to get the truth out of one of the crew members and Pete is making sure she doesn't get arrested." Clark explained.

"Oh." Chris and Lana said at the same time. Chris looked over at Lex who was smirking.

Phoebe turned around too.

"You know what's going on." She said.

"Yes. I know. I have an interview today. With Ryan Seacrest to talk about the benefit tonight." Lex explained.

"Oh that sounds cool." Phoebe said.

"If you guys hurry and find something to wear tonight I can make arrangements for you to be in the On Air studio audience." Lex said.

"We'll go get Chloe and we'll go on to Samantha's Boutique." Lana said and she and Phoebe left to go pry Chloe away from her newest story. Pete returned to where the guys were.

"Let's head up to Giorgio's then." Lex said.

Chris listened as Lex filled Pete in on the situation.

"That's dope." Pete replied. They took the escalator up to the second level.

* * *

Phoebe didn't know how Chloe and Lana had managed to talk her into buy them dakeris at the Dakeri Shack which was conveniently located next to Samantha's Boutique. So Phoebe ended up browsing the racks with a strawberry dakeri. There were worse things. She saw several dresses she liked and before she knew it she had spent an hour and a half trying them on. 

Lana, Chloe, and the shop girl gave rave reviews about the little black dress. It was strapless and mid thigh length in the front but in the back there was a ruffled train. It would look excellent with her black Minolo Blaniks. Lana chose a form fitting white dress it was very elegant except for the sheer places on both sides. Chloe, who Phoebe had always thought was a little odd chose a sea foam green eighties nightmare of a dress with black polka dots on it.

* * *

"No." Chris said about the hundredth tuxedo he had tried on.

He had tried on white, classic black, the ugly powder blue one, he had tried on nearly every style in the store. "I'm itching like a bastard." Chris said blatantly scratching himself. Lex who was standing in front of him laughed and shook his head.

"What?" Chris asked.

"I think I have an idea." Lex said.

"Simon." He called.

Lex's 20 something assistant poked his head through the curtain of the dressing room, "Yes Mr. Luthor." Simon said nervously.

"For the thousandth time call me Lex." Lex said.

"Excuse me a second Chris," Lex said stepping out of the dressing room to talk to Simon. Chris wasn't even trying to listen to their conversation although later when Lex returned with a grin on his face he realized he should have.

"Don't worry about the tux. I've got something better for you." Lex said.

"Oh no. I hope you didn't get me like a cummerbund and a g- string." Chris said.

"No I got you something _you'll _like to wear to the benefit. Not something _I_ would like you to wear later." Lex said cocking one of his barely there eyebrows.

Chris blushed at the out and out suggestion.

Lex had already sent Simon to a sport bar in the mall called Wings and Things to get them some beer. Lex didn't drink any he was taking occasional sips from his flask. About the time that Pete and Clark had picked out what they were going to wear. Simon, Lex's green eyed 20 something assistant returned with some bags from various stores like Buckle and Abercrombie and Fitch.

Lex and Simon had to chase Chris and make him go back into the dressing room. He didn't want to try on anything else. But when he saw what Lex and Simon had for him his opinion changed in a second. They had an exact replica of what Usher wore in the _Yeah _video. The Don Johnson white blazer the jeans, the striped shirt. The shoes, the trucker hat, and the jewelry.

Upon seeing the clothes Chris jumped straddled Lex.

"I love you man." Chris said hugging Lex tightly.

Simon retreated from the dressing room a second later. Chris went from gratitude to lust in two seconds flat and the next thing he knew he was making out with Lex.


	17. The Adventures of Lois and Chris?

**Authors Note: I know updates for this story are few and far between but I love it so I'm gonna continue I swear. **

**Chapter 17**

Chris detangled himself from Lex.

He looked up shyly at the billionaire, "I don't know what came over me."

"Chris, it's perfectly alright. In a few minutes I think it would have been fantastic." Lex said.

Chris blushed.

"I've never been with a guy before."

"The question is Chris, do you want to." Lex said.

Chris hated cold logic, unless he was the one presenting it of course. Though it didn't do much good to present cold logic to his charges, they were going to do whatever the felt like anyways.

Chris nodded biting his lip.

"You're so sexy." Lex said.

"You're pretty hot yourself."

"Damn it! What about Lana?" Lex asked.

"What about her she won't give two shits about us hooking up if she's allowed to watch." Chris said.

"What about your sister?"

"What?" Chris asked confused.

Last time he checked his sister was still in the future.

"Phoebe?"

"Oh…yeah…Phoebe…" Chris said.

Chris knew that Phoebe was going to give him the old I told ya so when she got a chance.

"Don't worry about her; I think she saw this coming." Chris said.

"Her foresight is amazing isn't it?" Lex said.

Chris eyed the older man suspiciously.

"Well, she reads people really well and giving romantic advice is what she does."

"Are you sure it doesn't come from the fact that she's an empath?" Lex asked.

Chris stared at Lex gaping for a few minutes and then he pulled himself together.

"Yes, I've known for a while."

"You've known what for a while?"

"That Phoebe and her sisters are witches. And from what I gather you are one too." Lex said.

"Ummm… I don't know what you're talking about."

"Come on Chris get off it. I've seen some damn funny things the over the past twenty four hours."

Chris sighed.

"Actually, I am a _Witchlighter_." Chris said pointedly.

"Witchlighter, that's a fairly new concept,"

"I am a the son of a witch and a Whitelighter, hence the term Witchlighter." Chris said.

"Whitelighter?"

"And I thought you did you homework," Chris snarked.

Lex gave him a look.

"A Whitelighter is a guardian angel type that guides and protects witches."

"Oh, okay."

"I'm one of three Witchlighters in existence. Technically speaking I don't exactly 'exist' yet." Chris admitted shyly.

"What?"

"I haven't actually been born, I'm from the future." Chris said.

Lex was staring at him in shocked silence.

"I thought you should know everything and then decide to get involved with me." Chris said.

"Time travel is possible?"

Chris nodded.

"With the help of a really good spell and of course some physics anything is possible."

"I'll keep that in mind."

Chris smirked.

"So are you okay with me. With who I am?" Chris asked.

"Why wouldn't I be? I just wish other people would be honest with me."

"Are you talking about Clark and Lana?"

"Who else would I be talking about? I've known Clark was different since the day we met, but Lana has been acting really weird over the last year or so."

"Well, I suppose they'll tell you when they're ready. And just because you call them on it doesn't mean that they'll be straight with you. They need time being different isn't easy." Chris said.

"I know that better that anyone. I don't have super powers or anything like that but I know what's like to be different."

"It's not easy especially not when you're in high school. Give them some time, they'll come around." Chris said.

"Thanks for the advice." Lex said.

"You're welcome, now can we get back to the kissing?" Chris asked.

"My pleasure," Lex said.

Chris put his arms around Lex's shoulders and kissed him again.

Lex wrapped his arms around Chris determined to make them closer.

* * *

Phoebe, Lana and Chloe were just leaving Samantha's when Phoebe collided with a girl with light brown hair.

"Excuse me," The girl called walking into the store just as Chloe stumbled out behind Lana.

"Lois!" Chloe screamed.

"Chloe! What are you doing up here?" Lois asked hugging the shorter girl.

"Drinking and shopping, two of my favoritest things." Chloe slurred.

Phoebe turned around regretting buying the two younger girls alcohol.

"You're Lois Lane," Phoebe said.

"Yeah," the girl said.

Lois couldn't have been much older than Chloe but she seemed much older.

"Lois do you know who that is. She's Phoebe Halliwell. A real reporter from _The San Francisco Bay Mirror_." Chloe said.

"I saw you on TV a couple of months ago. You give advice on relationships right?"

"Yep that's me." Phoebe said.

"That's cool, so you're here for Lex Luthor's charity thingamabob."

"Yeah are you going?" Phoebe asked.

"Yeah my dad is making me go. I've gotta wear dress and everything." Lois said.

"Samantha's got some cute stuff in for Spring." Lana said.

"Just as long as I don't have to wear anything pink." Lois said.

"I saw a cute gold satin dress with a plunging neckline." Phoebe said.

"Gold, I like gold. Was it sparkly? I don't do sparkly." Lois said.

"No it was skin tight though." Lana said.

"I can swing that. Where are you guys heading now?" Lois asked.

"We're on the hunt for jewelry." Phoebe said.

"Let me run in here and grab that dress in a size 6 and I'll come with."

"You aren't gonna try it on?" Phoebe asked.

"It'll be fine." Lois said.

"You should at least try it on we have plenty of time before the show starts." Lana said.

"Alright. Just so I want have to take the damn thing back and get a new one," Lois grouched.

Phoebe chuckled. Lois shopping for clothes reminded her of a few weeks prior when she'd went shopping for maternity clothes with Piper.

Phoebe followed Lana and Lois back into the store.

Lana felt a kindredness upon meeting Lois. She couldn't exactly put her finger on what it was but it was very familiar.

"What show?" Lois asked once they were inside the store.

"On Air with Ryan Seacrest." Lana told him.

"That man wears more product in his hair than I do." Lois exclaimed.

"Ain't it the truth." Lana said.

"I didn't quite catch your name," Lois said.

"Lana, Lana Lang."

"Nice to meet you." Lois said shaking Lana's hand.

"You're the first girl she shaken hands with that hasn't winced afterwards," Slightly buzzed Chloe observed.

"Yeah you didn't even wince; you have a firm handshake yourself." Lois said.

"Well, it comes from all the years of lifting coffee trays." Lana lied.

Lois grabbed the dress off the rack and disappeared into the dressing room.

She returned rather quickly awkwardly wearing the form fitting gold strapless dress.

It fit her tight around the hips, thighs and it flared out around her knees.

"I feel like a freaking lounge singer, but I do like the color," Lois told the sales girl.

"Got anything in I don't know a darker color?" Lois asked.

The sales girl went over to a rack and handed Lois a fire engine red, tango kind of dress."

"I think I'll make an exception this time." Lois said taking the dress from the sales girl and disappearing in the dressing room once again.

She returned wearing tight fitting low cut dress. It hung down to her calves in places and it had ruffles that traveled up revealing her knees.

"This is the one." Lois declared.

Chloe laughed.

"Does it have a place to hide your pepper spray?"

Lois twirled around making the dress flare up, and narrowed her eyes at her cousin.

Lana laughed.

"You know, I think it looks great." Phoebe said.

"Do you think I could wear boots with this?" Lois asked.

All three of them shook their heads.

"No? What about sneakers then?"

"No!" all three of the shouted.

"Fine."

"We'll just stop by the shoe dept. we're heading that way anyways." Lana said.

"Okay. I'll take it." Lois said handing the sales girl her credit card.

The event was going to certainly be interesting with Lois around.

* * *

The group met up thirty minutes later. Chris did his best to hide the hickey Lex had made on his neck with the collar of his shirt, the older man apologized profusely. But Chris assured him that it was all good. Very good as a matter of fact.

"I'm truly surprised the girls are actually on time." Clark remarked.

"Me too, seems like they've added to their number." Lex said.

"Well, at least now we've got an even number." Pete said.

"Not technically, Simon makes it odd again." Clark said.

"Actually Mr. Kent I've got a lot of filing to do back at the office." Simon put in.

"Yeah whatever Farnsworth." Pete said.

"Hi guys." Phoebe said grinning as she walked up to the guys, with the other three girls following closely.

"Guys," Chloe started, "I would like you to meet my cousin Lois Lane. Lois these are the guys."

"Clark is the tall one, Lex is the bald one, Chris is the loud one and Pete is my boyfriend."

"Hi,"

"It's nice to see you again Miss Lane," Lex said flashing Lois a smile.

Chris rolled his eyes.

"Nice seeing you too Lex. By the way how is that shoulder feeling?" Lois asked with a cheeky grin.

Chris could almost swear Lex was blushing.

"It's fine." Lex said.

Chris looked at Lex suspiciously.

"Her dad brought her over to my house last week and they made us fence." Lex explained.

"You're leaving out the part where I kicked your ass." Lois said.

Chris smirked. She was still the same Lois he knew from before, only younger and with frosted hair.

"You do that a lot don't you kick a guy's ass and then remind him of it every chance you get." Chris said.

"Well, that's the beauty of it. What's it to you anyways?" Lois said.

"Oh that's Chris, he said he knew you from karate camp or something you went to last year." Chloe explained.

Lois looked at him narrowing her brown eyes into slits, "Oh yeah, now I remember, you were that guy who never stopped talking."

Chris knew she was lying, but he nodded anyways. "I have a lot to say."

Lois laughed, "I bet you do, since we're on the subject of camp I need to ask you something over there." Lois said.

"I'm actually–"

Lois ignored Chris protests and yanked him by the arm.

"I'll have Simon have someone put this stuff in the cars. You guys go talk they'll save you guys some seats. I've got to go to hair and make up." Lex said.

"But–"

Chris tried to protest again but the Slayer drug him away from the group.

She slammed him into the door of the women's restroom pushed it open and shoved him inside.

Fortunately, no one was inside.

"I didn't go to Karate camp last summer and I have no idea who you are." Lois said.

Lois pulled out a small athame from her boot, "You've got five seconds to talk before I slice and dice."

Chris sighed, "Are Slayers the same?"

Lois' eyes widened when he said the S-word, he realized he'd really stepped in it this time when she lunged at him with the athame.

He grabbed her wrist but she swung at him with her free hand. He managed to block that blow and the kick she tried to deliver to his solar plexus.

Chris knew various forms of martial arts, some he picked up from his Aunt Phoebe and the rest he learned in his early days in the resistance.

He was able to block all of her blows, but the Slayer strength gave her a large advantage over him.

"We could do this dance all day, would you like to know how I know you're a Slayer?"

"First of all that is the most cliché thing I've ever heard. Secondly, we aren't dancing and third, I don't care what's one more dead demon in the grand scheme of things?"

"Okay," Chris said blocking another well placed kick.

"I am not a demon, far from it actually. It hurts me that you would assume such a thing." Chris said mockingly.

"This game of yours is getting tired."

Chris laughed, "Oh come on Lois admit it you love mysteries."

"You are not a mystery you're just some annoying demon friend of Lex's."

"Okay, I am SO tired of you saying that I'm a demon. I'm a freaking angel. Well, half angel to be exact."

"Yeah right." Lois said.

They were still trading blows actually she was trying to hit him and he kept blocking her.

Chris got tired of it after a few more minutes, his mother had made him swear once that he would never hit a girl unless she was out to kill him.

Lois was out to kill him but he just didn't feel right hitting her so instead he used his TK and sent her flying into a wall.

"I told you, I am not a demon I am a Witchlighter, part witch and part Whitelighter." Chris explained.

"So you're not a demon?" Lois asked picking herself up off the floor.

"NO!"

"You don't have to yell, I'm standing right here." Lois grouched.

"How do you know me anyways?" she asked the indignant look still on her face.

"I know you from the future." He replied simply as if time travel was a normal occurrence.

"Oh, like I'm gonna buy that. Did Buffy put you up to this?"

"No, I've never met Buffy. I've only heard stories about her." Chris said.

"I'm being Punk'd right? Aston Kutcher is gonna barge through that door any second." Lois said.

"You're not being Punk'd. I know you and Clark from the future, you guys work at the _Daily Planet_ in Metropolis. It's ironic because you saved my life once and now you're trying to kill me."

"You must have me confused with Chloe, I'm no reporter. And who's Clark anyways."

"He's that tall guy that had on all that flannel."

"Okay. I'm not saying I believe you but I'm just saying I'm not going to stab you in the heart with something pointy just yet." Lois said sheathing the athame.

"Like you could even touch me with that thing, in this time anyways. You haven't been a Slayer long. I've had my powers all my life." Chris said.

"Oh, I was holding back on ya Future boy. Didn't want to mess up that pretty face you're yours Lex wouldn't like that very much, you being his new boy toy and all." Lois said with a smirk.

"Don't worry, you'll be most valuable Slayer one day Lois,"

"Shut up," Lois said pushing open the bathroom door.

"Wow this is like old times." Chris said happily.

"They're new to me." Lois responded dryly.

They made their way back over to where the group had found seats in the studio audience. The set was complete and so colorful, looking at the guest couches hurt Chris' eyes.

Chris climbed up the steps to where the group had taken refuge in the middle row of the studio audience. Clark and Phoebe were flirting. Chloe was talking to a grip over in the corner and Pete was keeping her out of trouble. Lana had saved them each a seat.

"I was wondering when you guys would get back," Lana smiled warmly.

"Yeah we were just talking about old times." Chris said.

"Yep, old times." Lois said rolling her eyes.

"I'm so excited Lex managed to get us into the studio audience, this place is already starting to fill up." Clark said from his end of the row.

Chloe and Pete were finally coming to sit down with them before someone took their seats. It was almost time for the show to start, Chris was slightly giddy about seeing the show himself it had been so long since he'd been to a concert or anything.

He'd seen a couple of bands play a show or two at P3 but he hadn't really taken time to listen. Dressing up and going out tonight would be fun too, he never went to any dances or events and stuff in the future with all the dying and the destruction going on. He was actually looking forward to a normal evening. He should have known better.


End file.
